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Song Parodies -> "Desperate Auto"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Desperate Auto"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

For a Youtube look and listen to the OS of "Desperado" by the Eagles click HERE

Desperate auto, she cost me dollars and centses,
Nothing left for expenses, she's so gone now.
She’s a junk yard one,
When I whoa her brakes get to seizin'.
Her rings they are freezin', 'cause I heard them go pow.

Spits more carbon than a diamond, boy,
All beat up her clutch cable.
She'll blow machine ground parts and leave a driveway wet.
How she does to me unkind things, can't rely upon unstable.
Seems I only hunt for parts I can't get.

Desperate auto, gas and oil she hungers,
It's plain she's a klunker, like drivin' a stone.
I'm needin' less bleedin, or the bus to work I'm talkin',
A person soon walkin' to his work from his home.

Down the street she rolled fueled like turpentine,
Her sky roof's blown and just one light shines.
The car from hell's a fright time ride away,
She ain't cruisin' in gear high or low,
I get money and I'm dealin' her away...

Desperate auto, she will soon be past tenses,
Behind junk yard fences - weeds in her grate.
Her fluids drainin', and her main hose is rubbed through,
I better get somebody plug you,
(Get somebody plug you)
I better get some putty, plug you,
And patch up this crate.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   8

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Stan Hall - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
Sounds a lot like the '71 Toyota Corolla wagon that was my first new car (ironically, lemon yellow in color). The POS died (its 1st of many deaths) halfway up a Beltway on-ramp 1/4 mile beyond the dealership lot. 555 for you, 666 for it. :-)
Michael Pacholek - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
It's not bad, but it kinda ran out of steam. Not to the level of My Name Is Kenny's "Car Full of Holes," or even my own "A Matter of Rust." The question is, as Johnny D put it, did you have to "Pay THIS For Gasoline, Man?"
Red Ant - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
Sounds like my very first car - a 77 Impala. It got about six miles to the gallon - of antifreeze. I couldn't afford a new radiator, hoses or freeze plugs at the time, so I just drove it short distances and carried lots of water with me. Better than my friend's Vega though - when it seized on him on a bridge, he put the title and keys in the glove box and hitched home. 555
alvin - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
sounds like my first FIVE cars....i can SO the mournful tone of the OS well, too.....
alvin - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
i forgot to note that the security code for my comment was that perfect or what ?
Johnny D - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
Here's a gallon of 555 octane unleaded applause!
littleCupCakes - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
I loved this, Sir Guy. Yes, I've had a few cars from hell; currently I'm driving an '86 Chrysler LeBaron. 143,000 miles in 21 years!!
MrMacphisto - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
I got rid of mine recently.... 5-5-5
Guy - February 27, 2008 - Report this comment
To everyone except Michael Pacholek I thank and welcome your comments. This was a fun write.

Michael - The reason that I do not thank you for your comment is not because it was negative in nature - I can take that just fine, but to do so and then shamelessly plug your own song on MY SPACE on the same subject matter is a slap across the face. Next time you want to plug something that you wrote use your own space. Have some respect please.
Michael Pacholek - February 28, 2008 - Report this comment
CupCakes: That LeBaron wouldn't be formerly owned by Jon Voight, would it?
littleCupCakes - February 28, 2008 - Report this comment
The "bandit' was formerly my Dad's car; having been raised in the Great Lakes, ~JJ~ always wanted a convertible! My Sisters say it is time for me "to put the Bandit to rest". but it runs, my Scotty dog loves to ride in the wind, and it gets 25/gal, so why spend more money ? Right now, it ' s fine for me! PS: Guy, please excuse my using your parking space, Ok??
Guy - February 29, 2008 - Report this comment
Milady - You are using the space most respectfully and always have. This knight of the parody round table has no heartburn with M'lLady or anyone who does so with respect. Anything less just cheapens the site. Normally I just over look such rude comments but this time I decided to speak up. Michael and I go way back and he dissed me the first time he ever made a comment on one of my songs. He had it coming. A man would see the error and make amends. And I can just see your little Scotty with her curly hair all wind blown and enjoying every mile. Thanks, M;Lady.
Peregrin - February 29, 2008 - Report this comment
I never ever cared for the OS, I was way on my own in that regard I used to think, though :( However, Guy, you made it into an enjoyable read :)
Guy - February 29, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks Pip - This is why I drive Jeeps. They take a licking and keep on a ticking. I had a Corvair once. The engine is in the rear and is held to the body and frame by four bolts, two in the rear and two at the fore of the engine compartment. One night I was on this SW Pennsylvania road that was like a roller coaster. It went straight down for about 200 feet then right back up for about 125 feet, leveled for about 25 feet and then back up another 75 feet to the top. I decided to scare the shid out of my buddy who simply hated that hill. I drove down the long side hitting a speed of around 80 MPH. The car flew up the other side and hit that level area and the two bolts in the rear snapped like a toothpick dragging the engine another 50 feet up the hill. I thought I lost my muffler until the lights went out and everything kind of went dead. Thanks for weighing in on this.

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