Hey Blake, hey Kyle; tell 'em who I am....

Well I'm a hot stud muffin
I got lots of stuffin'
And I'm loved everywhere I go
I'm the hit of the disco
Even up in Frisco
Where I'm known as One Hung Low
I got fantastic pecs
And I get lotsa sex
But I still feel like a churl
'Cause for all of my kitscha
I just can't get my picture
On the cover of the next Playgirl

Next Playgirl
Wanna see my picture on the cover
Girl...
Gonna hide the copies from my mother
Wanna see my pouty face
On the cover of the next Playgirl

I got a dozen hot ladies
And they're all named Britney
And they all want in my jeans
Even tho' I keep on tellin' 'em
That it ain't my kind of scene
'Cause I like home design
And Martha Stewart
And I really like to be called Shirl
But I'd trade in my 'Vette sure
Just to get my picture
On the cover of the next Playgirl

Next Playgirl
Wanna see my picture on the cover
Girl...
Gonna hide the copies from my mother
Wanna see my pouty face
On the cover of the next Playgirl

I got a lot of sulky New-Age
Plat'num toy boys
Who'll kiss anything I say
I got a massive battery 'helper'
That don't criticise my being gay
I've got loads of friends
If the drinks I buy
I'm the hottest hunk in the world
I'm the world's biggest bi*cha
But I can't get my picture
On the cover of the next Playgirl

Next Playgirl
Wanna see my picture on the cover
Girl...
Gonna hide the copies from my mother
Wanna see my pouty face
On the cover of the next Playgirl
On the cover of the next Playgirl