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Song Parodies -> "Bye Bye To The Home Of The 'pies"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"Bye Bye To The Home Of The 'pies"

Parody Written by:

Stuart McArthur

The Lyrics

this is only so I can tick American Pie off my street-cred-list, so it will be gibberish to you non-Aussies................it's about a famous Aussie football club who recently lost their traditional home ground....................to non-Aussies (and Luke): "Pies"=short for Magpies=Collingwood (most famous Australian Rules football team).....Victoria Park=their home ground until recently ....footies=footballs.....September=Finals Time, when Collingwood notoriously always tanked (except for 1990) earning them their very own disease "the Colliwobbles"....flag=premiership victory.....Holden=Australian family car....speccie=spectacular catch....Eddie=Collingwood president....Blues, Bombers=2 rival teams that played the Pies in finals............Mr Sheen=furniture polish....ump=umpire who ruled Blues player Harmes "inside" the boundary in a controversial decision that cost the 'Pies a flag in '79 ............................................................................................and to Aussies from the southern states: you know all this
A long long time ago
I can still remember my first visit to Victoria Park
And I knew if the Magpies won
my dad would would buy The Sunday Sun
and we'd kick footies round 'til after dark

Septembers used to make me shiver
all those flags that weren't delivered
Dad was forced to ac-cept
the Colliwobble backstep

I still remember how I cried
when the news broke that this famous side's
home would say its last goodbye
"the day the football died"

So bye bye to the home of the 'Pie
drove my Holden up from Malvern
with a tear in my eye
Them good ol' Pies were heading somewhere nearby
I knew this'd be the day that it died -
This'd be the day that it died

Did you read the book on marks,
and did you take speccies in the dark,
when the second siren blew?
And could you believe that Rocca goal?
Did Daicos steal your Magpie soul
when he curved one from the boundary-line
straight through?

And the day Ralph missed that easy score
with the siren sounding just before
We all kicked off our shoes
cos we hate those devilish Blues

Then Eddie said their fate was sealed
and, though the fans refused to yield,
we'd all feared what was revealed
- the day the football died

So bye bye to the home of the 'Pie
drove my Holden up from Malvern
with a tear in my eye
Them good ol' Pies were heading somewhere nearby
I knew this'd be the day that it died -
This'd be the day that it died

A long time ago we all watched in awe
as the Pricey stabbed and the Picken soared
Len won the medal, and the finals were a cert...
And McKenna sang to a million teens
in a Beatles wig dipped in Mr Sheen,
and poor John Greening really hit the dirt

And we proved that Carmen wasn't wrong
when they said he nonged Tuck on the scone
To the replay we adjourned....
No verdict was returned

And with the final quarter ticking past
and Twiggy flew for that forward pass,
our hearts have only beat that fast
- the day the football died

So bye bye to the home of the 'Pie
drove my Holden up from Malvern
with a tear in my eye
Them good ol' Pies were heading somewhere nearby
I knew this'd be the day that it died -
This'd be the day that it died

Helter skelter - 1990 swelter
with the Bombers looking for a fall-out shelter
but there was no place left to go
And do you recall old Monky dancin'
in a coat he borrowed from James Manson
when Lethal brought the premiership cup back home?

And we knew that they were gonna win
cos we saw them training in the gym
No Bomber born in hell
could break that Lethal spell

We'd flocked all week
to Victoria Park,
to watch them training in the dark
- memories we hold dear to heart
the day the football died

So bye bye to the home of the 'Pie
drove my Holden up from Malvern
with a tear in my eye
Them good ol' Pies were heading somewhere nearby
I knew this'd be the day that it died -
This'd be the day that it died

I met a man who'd played the Blues
and I asked him for some happy news
He just smiled and walked away
He was a lonely draftee bronco buck
with an inclination to become first ruck,
but now he might not get the chance to play

All the pain from those heartbreaking
flags the Pies had for the taking
now just play a bit part
to the pain of losing Vic Park

And the three men I admire most
Ed, and Kev and Bobby Rose
stayed to watch the curtain close
the day the football died

So bye bye to the home of the 'Pie
drove my Holden up from Malvern
with a tear in my eye
Them good ol' Pies were heading somewhere nearby
I knew this'd be the day that it died -
This'd be the day that it died

In '79 - oh how I cried
when the ump said Harmes was just inside
That pain simply multiplied
the day
the football died

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   8
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User Comments

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Rick C - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOT (Don't know the original team) but, congrats on this!!!! 555
alvin rhodes - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
i know zero about AMERICAN football, let alone aussie football, but it was nicely paced and humorous...5s
AFW - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
excellent job of pacing and story telling...to what must be a tough song to parody..
Jeff Reuben - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Good job, and I'll note the improved cred list =) I actually did this song once myself, but it was for a company newsletter (and specific to the company) so it's not up here. Maybe I can get another one up here sometime...in like a year! Anyway, don't know much about Aussie football, except that it's cool to watch at 3 in the morning on ESPN4 while feeding baby.
Agrimorfee - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
You put your soul into this one, Stu, methinks. Very good rhymage throughout. 555
Stuart pie McArthur - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
thanks Rick, thanks alvin

thanks AFW - it wasn't so bad, only because there were so many parallels in the story to the OS, which is why I saw my chance - I can't imagine tackling the OS otherwise

thanks Jeff, now to Major General *deep breath* - it used to be Starsky and Hutch repeats for me with bub'n'the'bottle at 3am - hope you get to see the Richmond Tigers one day, er night, (yellow and black colours) - the Collingwood 'Pies were my dad's team ;-)

thanks Agri - yes there was a lot of personal stuff that I ruthlessly exploited :-)
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
What's a mark? ;) Great parody.
Stuart McArthur - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
* sceptical * Luke, a mark is the very-well known Australian Rules Football word for catch, ie. "he marked the ball" = "he caught the ball"...........okay, I believe you didn't know that, up there in NSW (which is why I added you to my broad sweep of non-Aussies in the preamble.......and thanks for the 5s :-)
Red Ant - May 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Forgot to comment on this one. Great job though like Rick I DKTOT. Your street cred list is one better. PS- "Modern Major General" was easier for me than this was.
Kristof Robertson - May 27, 2005 - Report this comment
although I hate the 'pies with a PASSION (carn the Hawks!) I LURVE your AFL parodies...fabulous work! 555
John Jenkins - May 27, 2005 - Report this comment
I, too, am one of those provincial Americans who know nothing about Aussie football, but I enjoyed this parody. There are some things that all followers of sports can relate to. And it's refreshing to see an "American Pie" parody with the word Pie in the title that actually means something in the parody.
Stuart McArthur - May 27, 2005 - Report this comment
thanks Red Ant - I'm having trouble even coming up with an idea for MMG, because the idea's got to be good enough to fuel a lot of funny lines, and there's also Kristof's "Artifici-al" staring down arrogantly at all nervous newcomers

good on you Kristof! - you and that Aussie who writes about bum-cracks were my entire target demographic for this!! (BUT!! - now I've done American Pie!! - needle needle) ;-)

Thanks very much John J, for the read. It was so detail-specific with famous Aussie Rules football events and players' names, that I just assumed I would lose every US reader by line 6, so I'm honoured that you stuck with it!!

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