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Song Parodies -> "2005 ( the year the music died )"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"2005 ( the year the music died )"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

This is the hardest parody I've made so far. This is a slam on all crappy music and acts/events from 2000 to 2005. While the year isn't over yet I do not see it getting any better musically. Some of this is prediction, artistic license and personal tastes.
A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How the music used to make me smile
And I knew that I had choices
That I would not hear crappy voices
And, maybe, I'd be happy for a while

But two-thousand made me shiver
With every singer they deliver
Bad news for the Red Ant
I couldn't help one more rant

I can remember when they lied
When I read about the comments snide.
But something wretched from deep inside
The year the music died

So good bye, to two thousand and five
Need some Advil hearin' Avril,
But the endings in sight
And these bad new waves of artists vocals I sigh
Sayin' " this'll be the year that it died "
" this'll be the year it died "

Did you sing a song 'bout love.
And do you have faith " In God We Trust ",
If producers sell your souls?
I do believe in rock 'n roll,
Bad music rapes my aural holes,
So now I reach to change the radio

Well I knew you're in love with him
' cause I heard you're pregnant and MILFin'
You all made front page news
Man, that's criticism and dues

I'm not the only person thinking " F*** "
And with no salvation from this musical suck,
But I know I'm s**t out of luck
The year the music died

So I'm wavin',
" bye-bye, to two thousand and five "
Dissed on Jacko but he's wacko
and that wacko has lied
Them good young boys were taking liquor and bribes
Wonderin' " will we have to testify ? "
" will we have to testify ?

Now for ten years we have all well known,
Michael's nose's flat as a paving stone
But that's not how he used to be.
In the eighties known as the king of pop,
Now the news is broken what a shock
And my voice said " This has to stop ",

Oh, and while the judge was looking down,
Has Michael tossed his horny crown?
The courtroom has adjourned,
No verdict has returned.
And while rumors play a major part,
Neverland's an amusement park?
And I swore curse words in the dark
The year that Michael lied.

So I'm writing
" bye-bye, to two thousand and five "
American Idol is dull
And the talent is dry
Paula, Randy, and Simon's humor is wry
They're cringing " this'll be the day that we die "
" this'll be the day we die "

Ashlee Simpson is a known lip-syncher
And danced like crap that SNL stinker
8 Mile sucked and wouldn't last
It landed square on it's a$$
The players hate it's just b!tchy sass,
With true artists* in cemetary casks

Now the half-time show was it Janet
Or Timberlake's plan to have planned it?
We all got just a glance,
But was it censored not a chance!
' cause announcers they made a shield
The FCC refused to yield
Do you recall what was revealed
The day the nipple flied?

And I'm writing,
" bye-bye to two thousand and five "
Went from Green Day to the Cold Play,
But the old way was fine
The good old days of hearing lyrics that rhymed
And writin' " this will be the year that it died "
" this will be the year it died "

Woe, and here we are all in one place
A generations bad disgrace
With no patience to hear again
So come on: Jimi Hendrix, Aerosmith!
Not trash that makes Red Ant sick
' cause covers are singers only friend

Woe, and as I watched them on stage
My shirt was drenched in spit from rage
New singers come from hell
It makes blood pressure swell
And as the lames climbed higher in the chart
It is such superficial art,
I swear satan's laughing in his heart
The year the music died

So I'm writing
" bye-bye to two thousand and five "
Went from hard rock to the soft pop
But the new pop's a crime
Them good ole days of hearing Williams and Cline
And writing " this'll be the year that it died "
" this'll be the year that it died "

I heard a girl who "sang" some "blues"
And asked myself " She missing screws? "
So I just barfed and walked away.
I went down to the Wal-Mart store
Where explicit lyrics are no more
Ev'ry man there said " Music's bad today "

And in the shows: the groupies' screams
The critics sighed, the artists' dreams
And the three men I admire the most:
Layne Staley, John, and Elvis's ghost
They caught the last train for the coast
Before the music died

And Amirighting,
" bye-bye, to two thousand and five "
Hope that next year's not like this year,
Because this year has died
And them great old songs hearin' Beatles were tight
Singing " Lucy in the sky one more time "
" Lucy in the sky one more time "

So I'm writing,
" bye-bye, to two thousand and five "
Hope that o' six is not amiss,
And that Paris would die
Them good old day of hearing classics of mine
Wishing " this would be the day for all-time ".
Notes: I like most of the artists here. 8 Mile did suck, but Eminem is good. Even listened to some Beatles, Patsy Cline, Elvis and Hank Williams albums. * Most of the better artists are now no longer with us. Maybe if they were music today would be good. PS- Sorry for interjecting my own name in here twice.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 31

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   4
 2
 1
 
 5   26
 28
 29
 

User Comments

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alvin rhodes - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
great job on a difficult song...and i could not agree more with your message..5s plus
Rick C - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
I salute you! As Alvin said (he always gets here before me), the message is dead on and, it's gotta be a tough song to parody. 555
Red Ant - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you much alvin and Rick.
2Eagle - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, there's always Broadway.
Scrawny Johnny - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Congratulations!!! You have successfully parodied one of the most difficult songs to parody!! I envy you! Your topic holds true that most music today does indeed, suck. That's why I listen to a classic rock station. Never again will you have a Van Halen, a Nirvana, a Scorpions, an Aerosmith - heck or even an Alice in Chains! Most of these bands will die off with only one, maybe two albums (highly unlikely three) and never be heard again. In my belief, the only rock band I feel has the foundation to last for a long time is Audioslave, but that's just my prediction...
Red Ant - April 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks 2 Eagle, though where I live it's a LONG way from Broadway. Scrawny Johnny I appreciate the comments. Wasn't sure you would KTOS, but yes this was a PITA to make. I now have 2 of the 5 " Holy Grail " parodies done ( the other was Bohemian Rhapsody ). Now I need desperately to parody " I am the very model of a modern major general " to get to 3 ( don't remember the other 2 ). THAT will be even harder than this I think. Of course, I still have 3 of my own " Holy Grail " parodies to make, only one of which has been done before ( once ). I'm estimating those 4 parodies will take close to 600+ hours ( yes, six-hundred plus ) to make very well.
Michael Pacholek - April 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Pretty good, but I had to dock you a point for dissing April Levine. (Funny, she doesn't look Jewish, but she sure kvetches enough.) Now, if "American Pie," "Bohemian Rhapsody" (both of which I've done more than once) and "Modern Major General" (which I haven't done) are three of the five, what are the other two? Maybe "The Wreck"?
Red Ant - April 26, 2005 - Report this comment
No problem Michael. Avril was picked because she had a 2 syllable name that rhymed with " Advil ". The thread is this link : http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php/topic,8980.0.html TWotEF is listed in the original 5 but I find it diffcult because of its length. " Beauty and the Beast " is the other. I recall commenting that a S&G song should be included either TSOS or Scarborough Fair/Canticle as they are difficult to do well. ( done The Sound of Silence, working on Scarborough Fair ).
Jeff Reuben - April 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Very well done! "Need some Advil hearin' Avril" -- my favorite line
Red Ant - April 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Jeff. That one my sister came up with actually. She also believes that todays music is horrible.
Dominic L. - May 05, 2005 - Report this comment
So true! I can't stand that rap junk, and classic rock is the way to go! Even some of the older bands who still record are selling out! anyway, 555.. the first verse is a lot like the original, but It didn't sway my vote, because it's not a big deal.
Red Ant - May 06, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Dominic L.
Stephen aka Step-chan - June 09, 2005 - Report this comment
555. That was a nice and enjoyable read. American Pie is one song I myself won't parody(at least not while using the library's internet, due to the fact that there is a 1 hour time limit, I don't think I could type it in fast enough). This is actually one of those songs I haven't heard in years, but the pacing was easy to remember. Very good.
Red Ant - June 10, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Step-chan.
Stephen aka Step-chan - August 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Actually, I now remember that I have Weird Al's parody. My Bad, I forgot.
Huff - November 18, 2005 - Report this comment
This is a good one. I can't fully agree with your view on today's music, but most of it does suck. Even Metallica is starting to turn sour...... Hey that gives me an idea for a parody! 555
Red Ant - November 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Huff!
Stinky Marshmellow - December 04, 2005 - Report this comment
8 mile sucked. badly...like sucked donkey meat...hehe...um long song...i like TOS its pretty good, no? i thot so...hey how did u do the bio on ur page? wicked awesome
Red Ant - December 04, 2005 - Report this comment
"long song" is an understatement. Once you have 25 submissions you can E-mail ChuckyG with a bio is you want to. TOS is pretty good. Thanks SM.
Adagio - December 15, 2005 - Report this comment
It looks as if I wasn't the only one who liked "Need some Advil hearin' Avril," You did a lot of work on this...all good...5's, Jack.
Red Ant - December 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Pat, and yeah, varying all 7 choruses was much work.
Amberle - January 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Would you allow an independant webradio station to record this (giving you credit of course) to play on their show along w/ other spoofs they've recorded? They write most of them but this one is wonderful!!!
Red Ant - January 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Amberle, yes, if someone wanted to record and play this it would be fine with me. If it does get recorded I ask that a URL of the website is left here in the comments so I can here the finished product. Thanks!
Becky - February 17, 2006 - Report this comment
EXCELLENT!!!!!! and very funny, too!!!
S.T.G. - March 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Such a powerful song
Matthias - March 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Hell even the Real Slim Shady would say that the 8-Mile sucked... But this song did not.... I like the paving stone analogy
Cat - March 29, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC #s) "Advil hearin' Avril"...hilarious! I must admit I disagree slightly with your opinion though, although mainstream music is indeed heinous, there is TONS of good indie stuff out there if you're willing to look. I listen to a good deal of modern bands, and I am a firm believer that there is good and bad music in every era.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
(Numbers/Symbols) - Not knowing where to start I'll just rant a bit here. The dissing of 8 miles (a movie I for some reason I can't recall actually kinda liked) brought back memories of a science fiction type of parody idea that never got of the ground, though it did longer in my sketchbook for quite some time. I planned to do "Space Battle Rap", kinda like a feud parody between Star Wars Fans and Star Trek Fans. I still remember these lines:

Yo, Jedi fighters, you're a bunch of wussies
An' Chewbacca's race is a bunch of pussies

And, of course, in the end when the audience was gonna shout: "Choke! Choke! Choke!" Darth Vader was gonna come in and do just that to everyone in the room!
Johnny D - April 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC) Powerful job on a tough song to parody, Red Ant. Well done.
Stuart McArthur - April 12, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC) I somehow missed this one, Jack - amazing - a thorough and broadly-scoped epic - 555
Red Ant - April 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Becky, STG, Matthias, Cat, Peter, Johnny D, and Stu.

Cat: I'm not sure exactly what is considered "indie". While I agree there is good/bad music in every era, it seems post 2000 that ratio has seriously shifted for the worse.

Peter: You probably liked 8 mile for the same reasons I did - good final rap scene, music, and Eminem getting his ass kicked. ;-)
Agrimorfee - May 12, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC05 Finals) I totally disagree about 8 Mile...damn good songwriting, nevertheless. 555
Johnny D - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC Finals) See above!
Spaff.com - June 25, 2006 - Report this comment
I'm not sure how I missed this, Ant. OK, actually, I *am* sure how I missed this: I'm a slacker. Great work on a beast of a song to parody (or so I've heard), especially since you varied all the choruses. Wow. Since this is such a monumental effort, would I be a jerk to point out that there are a couple of lines missing in the "church bells all were broken" stanza? (If so, I won't mention it.) More kudos to your sister for the Advil line, and I'm also smitten with a bunch of other lines, particularly "Bad music rapes my aural holes." As for the message of your parody: You'll be pleased to hear that 2006 is a GREAT year for music after all. We've got "Bad Day" and "You're Beautiful" in heavy rotation, and Paris Hilton's got an album coming out....
Red Ant - July 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Agrimorfee, Johnny D and Spaff. Spaff, thanks for pointing out those missing lines, and no, that's not being a jerk. I will probably buy Paris Hilton's album just to turn one of the songs around on her. Plus, I need a new drink coaster.
Dylan Baranski - June 12, 2007 - Report this comment
I know how you feel, man. I'm not into too much music made after 9/11 except for Weird Al.
Red Ant - July 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Hmm... I never thought of 9/11 as the death of music... I still don't, but, for the most part, the last decade's worth of music has sucked as badly as I said some 2+ years ago.
theflamelord A.K.A billie joe fan - March 30, 2009 - Report this comment
wow im super amazed that it was this good. normally american pie parodys dont hold my intrest past 4th corus but this one i finished. nice work me like

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