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Song Parodies -> "The Cat In The Hat"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don Mclean

Parody Song Title:

"The Cat In The Hat"

Parody Written by:

MasonR

The Lyrics

I know. Everyone's done this one. But how many can say they did it as
a tribute to Theodore Geisel?
A long, long time ago...
I can still remember when our mother left and went to town
And there was nothing we could do
My sister and I sat and stewed
Just sitting, hoping to erase our frowns
Then our fish it gave a shiver
And our house, it seemed to quiver
Big cat on our doorstep
He walked inside, he seemed hep
I can't remember what I said
When I saw that strange hat on his head
But something told me I should dread
That strange, amazing cat

So who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that is one amazing cat
That is one amazing cat

Did Seuss write the books I love?
Did you hear a Who or sew a Snuvv?
And will you get up today?
Who sews Sue's socks? Sue sews Sue's socks
Who sees who sew Sue's two new socks?
And can you please read that line again, real slow?

Well, I know I shouldn't have let him in
'Cause the trouble, it would soon begin
We both forgot our blues
When he said "let's play something new"
So the cat played up-up with a fish
He balanced Mother's brand new dish
On a mop--what would Mom think of this?
What an amazing cat!

I started singing
Who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that is one amazing cat
That is one amazing cat


Now Mother shouldn't have left us on our own
What would she say when she got home?
But that's not how it used to be
Cause I learned about the ABCs
From the quick queen of Quincy and the Kings knees
And a Ziz Zazzer-Zuz yes, that is me

Oh, and while Horton was looking down
Each Who in Whoville wore a frown
Their sound was loud and clear
But only to Horton's ear
And while Thing 2 left some messy marks
We found a being in the park
We took him home. We called him "Clark"
Now Poppa's in the pail.

We were singing
Who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that is one amazing cat
That is one amazing cat

Helter skelter, what a big mess
A kite flew off with mother's best dress
Eight feet high and falling fast
Where is Brown? He flew real fast
Came back with Black, who's not a lass
While the Once-ler chopped the trees down to the last

Now those Truffula tress had sweet perfume
But the Lorax, he predicted doom
We asked the Things to leave
But the cat had something up his sleeve
'Cause that cat, he stirred up quite a fuss
With Calculatus Eliminatus
This was a cat we didn't trust
And mom would be home soon

We started singing
Who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that is one amazing cat
That is one amazing cat

Oh and there we were on the same page
Read every word, don't lose your place
Or else we'll have to start again
So come on, kids be nimble, jump a lot
Stop! You must not hop on pop!
And that cat thinks he's fun and games, a friend

But as I saw him on the page
No words declenched, my fish enraged
Look at the feet, feet, feet
How many feet you'll meet!
And as the cat held fish to higher heights
In a kettle, fish did alight
I saw children laughing with delight
At that amazing cat

They were singing
Who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that is one amazing cat
That is one amazing cat

That was so many years ago
I've grown up, have kids of my own
They say "read it again, OK?"
I went down to the Borders store
'Cause my kids said, "Dad, please buy more
of those Seuss books. They make reading seem like play."

And through the malls the children streamed
Their minds made numb by DVDs
But not a word was spoken
Their TV sets were broken
And my favorite buddies in the land:
The Lorax, Horton, Sam-I-Am
Sat down and ate green eggs and ham
With that amazing cat

And they were singing
Who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that is one amazing cat
That is one amazing cat

And they were singing
Who's that? It's The Cat In The Hat.
He was dressy. He played messy
Then cleaned up. That is that.
Thing 1 and Thing 2 destroyed my habitat
But that was one amazing cat.
Note: I deliberately avoided references to the Mike Meyers movie...but
there are a couple of allusions to the 60s-era cartoon version,
with the title character vocalized by my favorite parodist, Allan
Sherman!Song parody by Mason Resnick

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 5   13
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

QC79 - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
WOW! This is hilarious. The best sonic similarity: "My hands were clenched in fists of rage" became "No words declenched, my fish enraged". Nice. (I had to look up "declenched" though...)
Kid - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
What's a Snuw? I dunno, what's a Snuw with you? :D
alvin rhodes - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
great job on this one...many clever lines..5s
John Jenkins - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Very well done, Mason. I have a hunch your kids are going to enjoy it when you read this parody to them, as well.
Stuart McArthur - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
fantastic Mason, and a great idea too - you paid better tribute here to the C in the H than Mike Myers ever managed - 555
Meriadoc - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
5 Zaxes for you and a whole Bottle of Battling Beetles! Excellent job!
Johnny D - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
A brilliant song, this song, it whams, and slams, the ham, of "Steeleye Span" !
MasonR - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for the great comments, all!
Pfligstar - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
I work with elementry school kids, I'm going to play this for them and teach them to worship you. Amazing work.
TJC - July 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Just wonderful.... I just discovered you and I've been going over your compendium tonight... you're one talented dude...I love your word play and great imagination... some of your best work (to me the American Pie parody) reminds me of Spaff... PS... I enjoy your magazine too! Looking forward to more of your stuff.

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