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Song Parodies -> "Make America Great"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"Make America Great"

Parody Written by:

Bob Gomez

The Lyrics

Now available on HillaryForAmerica.com: the Woman Card, the Hispanic Card, the LGBQT Card, the Experience Card, and the Actual Fleshed Out Policy Positions Card.
Not so long ago
And I can still remember how "Apprentice" used to make me gag
And I knew if I had your wealth
That I'd restore my hair to health
And maybe entertain my friends in drag

Last June you rode your escalator
And all the pundits thought you'd crater
Gaffes, flip-flops, and more gaffes
And weirder stuff from your staff

When Lewandoski grabbed her arm
And left bruises, it set off alarms
Somehow you retained your charm
Today, you're yuuge, big guy

Hate, hate makes America great
Build a wall and keep the Muslims out of every state
And we'll waterboard, electrocute and castrate
Till we find another group we can hate
That'll make America great

Did you write "Art of the Deal"
And do you have sexy hair appeal?
Did Melania tell you so?

And do you believe your name is gold
You rent it, then casinos fold and
Did your shirts and steaks and ties
Get sold?

Now I know that you're worth major bucks
So why's every venture gone bankrupt?
The tax you paid was nil--
You could've pay off Hillary's bill, still!

You were a pouty spray tanned mogul's son
With a swimsuit model and an onion bun
And your new life had just begun
Today, you're yuuuge, big guy

And now we're singing

Hate, hate makes America great
Build a wall and keep the Muslims out of every state
And we'll waterboard and tase their balls and castrate
Till we find another group we can hate
That'll make America great

Now for six years you had one hit show
Later caused those celebrity heads to roll
But that's not free publicity

When the candidates numbered seventeen
You were brash, outspoken, downright mean
And you voiced insane misogyny

Then as the field was narrowed down
Chris Christie threw his weight around
Ben Doctor never learned--
Fiorina lost her turn!

And while Megyn Kelly's eyes burned red
You never took back what you said
You just doubled down, full speed ahead
'Cuz hey, you're yuuuuge, big guy

Now we're singing

Hate, hate makes America great
Let's find out how many women we can alienate
And they'll roll their eyes as they pre-menstruate
We'll check off another group we can hate
That'll make America great

Raucous caucus, didn't really shock us
The Huffin' Post had a chance to mock us
SNL chalked up some laughs

The frantic crowds had your back
Protesters cried, talkin' major smack
But a right hook from the blindside laid 'em flat

Well, you got mad props from David Duke, that
White supremacist head kook
You claimed you'd never met--
So easy to forget!

When the marchers got punched to their knees
The punchers became arrestees
They knew you'd pay their legal fees
'Cuz hey, you're yuuuuge, big guy

They were singing

Hate, hate makes America great
Build a wall and keep the Mexicans from picking our grapes
Although some are nice, they're bringing drugs and they rape
Now let's find another group we can hate!
That'll make America great!

Now we're left with three candidates
We've had enough Faux News debates
And your poll numbers seem to swell

So come on, Cruz and Kasich, take your licks
Marco, go fixate on your dick, 'cause
Sucking is what losers do so well

Well, the system's rigged with party rules, while
Delegates get played for fools
GOP superPAC's--
None ever gave you jack!

And while Prince Reebus tried to maintain calm
And Cleveland braced for guns and bombs
You crowned yourself the king at high school prom
'Cuz hey, you're yuuuuuuge, big guy

And we're singing

Hate, hate makes America great
Build a wall and keep the refugees from praying prostrate
And we'll throw reforms up so they can't immigrate
Till we find another group we can hate
That'll make America great

I met a girl from Black Lives Matter
And I threw some Trump-y Trump quotes at her
But she just flipped me double birds

I went down to the synagogue
Where my rabbi called you demagogue
Who can't comprehend the impact of his words

Twitter, Facebook and BuzzFeed
All document your power and greed
But Indiana's spoken
The Lincoln Party's broken

And the three men I admire most
The Holy Pope and both the Kochs
Just shook their heads, saying, "Holy smokes!"
But hey, you're yuuuuuuuge, big guy

But hate, hate makes America great
With the Donald as the President there'll be no debate
And we'll target families of Islamic State
Surely that'll make America great
┬ęBob "This'll Be the Song for Ones Guys" Gomez 2016

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 1.7
How Funny: 1.7
Overall Rating: 1.7

Total Votes: 33

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   27
 27
 27
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Dr Giorgio Coniglio dec - May 03, 2016 - Report this comment
This is yuuuuge 5s
The old Sarge - May 03, 2016 - Report this comment
And lets not forget the "Get out of jail free card" You know, for compromising those hundreds, or is it thousands, of bits of secret and top secret information. For basically commiting enough security breaches to send an entire battalion of enlisted personnel to Ft Leavenworth
Rob Arndt - May 04, 2016 - Report this comment
555 for the parody, but Geesh Bob!!! Btw, Trump won again and Cruz quit. Gonna be interesting to see who he picks as RM. I'd make up and pick Rubio. That way he might be able to win California, New Mexico, and Arizona more easily, but would have to also make up with McCain!!! No Palin, no Cruz, no Kasich. Maybe Christie?
Friends'n'Allies - May 04, 2016 - Report this comment
Wrong title. Should be "Make America Grate".
Bob Gomez - May 04, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks, all, for the votes and comments. Bob out (drops mic).
Dr Giorgio Coniglio dec - May 05, 2016 - Report this comment
I literally can't believe how many short-sighted people contributed low scores. Too bad for 'them' if 'they' didn't consider how good your effort was. 5s
Patrick - May 08, 2016 - Report this comment
I don't use the number rating system, but this is definitely a masterpiece. Sums up the campaign accurately and with humor. Catches all the references to Muslims, Mexicans and other targets. I see Trump as the only viable alternative to the Anti-Christette (Hillary Clinton), but this in no way detracts from my judgement of this song as an example of the best type of parody writing.
Rob Arndt - May 08, 2016 - Report this comment
Hey Patrick, what happened to you? You seem absent. Are you just lurking now?
Bob Gomez - May 10, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks, Rob, Patrick, lurking good.
Rob Arndt - May 10, 2016 - Report this comment
Hey Bob, as long as you're doing political parodies, can you do a new one knocking McCain and Palin? Both of them get on my nerves same as Ted Cruz, Kasich, and Ryan! One might say they all have bad REPutations ;-)
Bob Gomez - May 10, 2016 - Report this comment
Sorry, Rob, BTDT.
Melanie Lee - May 16, 2016 - Report this comment
Trump, Trump, Trump...the votes are sick'ning! Great work, although you should've repeated the last chorus. I especially loved the last stanza. 555 and a one-way ticket to Canada!

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