I got a black leech, big in size...got to feed the thing should stick it on me thighs
Got a long body that is gonna swell...it is squidgy for it has no shell
Really likes a lot of blood an' I don't wanna give...need to find a donor if the thing is gonna live
Asked my mother but she didn't wanna know...ahhhhh no, no, no

I'll take a hold now of my nan...make a lesion with an old metal can
It's a long cut so blood is gonna flow...mess will feed the leech an' really make it grow
Think I'll take another trip to where the leech was got...take a tub with me an' gather more, I think they're hot
My nan is whiney an' is gettin' kinda slow...ahhhhh no, no, no

I'm gonna breed 'em but I've got to move...I need a farm to rear 'em for the zoos
Maybe earn a pile, sell 'em by the pound...if the zoo won't pay I'll mince 'em for my hungry hounds
Put 'em in a pot an' mash 'em then I'm gonna sieve...gonna be a joker, to my bro I'm gonna give
He cried "You f*cker" then he struck me with a blow...ahhhhh no, no, no