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Song Parodies -> "Zeroes"

Original Song Title:

"Heroes"

Original Performer:

David Bowie

Parody Song Title:

"Zeroes"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

My, my worth has been binned
I'm a bin'ry, and one is my kin
Yo!, nothings, nothings have no value, never
We're a goose egg, no more, whatsoever
For we are the zeroes, zip-zilch, ole!

I, I'm a nix thing
No use - when you're add-ing
We're nothings, in cardinal ways
We just be zeroes, nil value, hey?
We can be loves, tennis-y way

Why, I am no number (I'm no number)
Nada, none at all (none at all)
And it's hard, blot mul-tiplying (no use trying)
We're not missed, when you're adding a naught (nothing is aught)
All the same, we're ciphers full of pride
If you repeat them, nils never make ever
So proud to be zeroes, null set displayed

We can be zeroes
You and me, zeroes
We can be zeroes
Less than one, eh?
We can be zeroes

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2
 1
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 0
 
 4   3
 3
 5
 
 5   12
 12
 12
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Paul Robinson - May 30, 2006 - Report this comment
I wanted to give you "5's", but this damn binary scoring system only had the option of "1" or "Not 1"...j/k, of course...found the "5's" ~ ~ ~
Lionel Mertens - May 30, 2006 - Report this comment
This parody left me with a null feeing after a laughed my ass off. 5's
mandamoo - June 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Great song, excellent parody ! I especially like the line "I'm a bin'ry, and one is my kin" !!! :)
zeroishlish - January 12, 2007 - Report this comment
the song is so zero-ish wow i wish my jeans were zero ya this sucks
Emily Dickinson - August 12, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm nobody! Are you nobody, too?

If zeroes are so valueless, why do lawyers' eyes always light up when they evaluate a case and say, "I see zeroes!" (or does that idiom not exist below zero latitude? -- Hey, come to think of it, where would the Greenwich Meridian and the Equator be without zero?)

Was "nix thing" a ref to (Richard) Nixon?
Loved "tennis love" (which never made sense to moi).
No Japanese aircraft? xD
If you think multiplying by 0 is fruitless, try dividing by it....   ∞

The only "zero" here is the unabomber whose comment is above this one.... Guess the only way to score this is:
00000 00000 00000
Peregrin - August 12, 2012 - Report this comment
Hi Emily, and thanks for your comments. You're not from Massachusetts by any chance, are you?

For info, the Equator splits us. To take your statements/questions:

Yes, I thought about answering zeroishlish, but I just could not find the words. I wish I understood the 'jeans' reference...!?!
Nixon: No. "Nix" = "a quantity of no importance", for our purposes, translated to nil
"Tennis Love" - one theory (of numerous theories) from Wiki: "The origin of the use of "love" for zero is also disputed. It is possible that it derives from the French expression for "the egg" (l'œuf) because an egg looks like the number zero"
"Zeroes (aircraft)" - the idea was 'flown' by Pippin, but 'shot down' by Merry, as we were trying to get the parody only to talk about zero number equivalences. So, that idea 'crashed and burned'
Marni Nixon - August 12, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm a "nix thing" -- a zero -- because I dubbed all of Audrey Hepburn's *real* singing in the film version of "My Fair Lady", and how much credit did I get? Zero.... not even a name on the screen crawl at the end. (sniff)

Did you mean, ED's idiom regarding lawyers doesn't translate Down Under? In what used to be the Land of Opportunity, but is now the Land of Liability, the expression means that the lawyer pictures his side winning damages in many figures, i. .e., with many zeroes, such as $10,000,000.00. So, zeroes are quite valuable to them (and in creating very large numbers in general).

Logical reply re: t0ra, t0ra, t0ra.

"Free advice is worth the price." Mine: Don't try to figure out obscure comments from unabombers. They have zero brains, ipso facto. His/her "genes" are zero, and can't spell, either? ... else, I don't get the jeans ref, and wouldn't waste time. Ignore all such!

As for Emily and me, the waters around Massachusetts are too cold for us poikilotherms. ;-D
Peregrin - August 14, 2012 - Report this comment
Marni: ED's idiom did indeed make sense (more like dollars) We mainly have bush lawyers down here. Does that translate back?

I actually enjoy bizarre offbeat comments like the jeans thing - it makes me want to understand what goes on inside their heads. *Something* is happening in there, as to what...that's another story!
Marni Nixon - August 14, 2012 - Report this comment
We would more likely say "bush-league" lawyers, a ref to baseball's minor leagues being "bush leagues", i. e., games played in fields in rural areas surrounded by flora, not concrete. But as an ellipsis, it was quite understandable to this uncredited writer.

Bush lawyers included John Ashcroft and Alberto Gonzales. (US-centric joke.)

Alas, to certain evil-minded ones, "bush lawyer" may imply defending prostitutes and strippers, pawrn producers, ... use your imagination, but not too much. ;)

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