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Song Parodies -> "Wife in Bars"

Original Song Title:

"Life on Mars?"

Original Performer:

David Bowie

Parody Song Title:

"Wife in Bars"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

She's a loud slothful cheap affair
Blonde with surely dark-rooted hair
Now her money is running low
Sugar Daddy has told her "Go blow!"
She can't bend or her rear will be seen
As she walks with a drunken lean
To coquette with the nearest queue
And she's soaked to the gills with gin
Got a skill - she's a ravening whore
'Cus she slept with ten guys since 4
She's a twit with no moral rules
As she's puttin' the make upon

Failures writhing on the dance floor
Those men - drinkin' their wages low
It's the meatiest show
Take a look at this woman
Fawning after wrong guys
So man! Understand you'll never know...
Still I persist telling: Don't
Choose your wife in bars

It's an American search for vows
That chick's on spouse hunt - hard-up and how
Now the bikers are in the game
She's gonna be nailed again
Says it's nice for to be explored
Those high heels don't see her ignored
With four-letters she's quite profound
In her grammar, both verbs and nouns
But she's finding it harder to score
'Cus she looks like some bad decor
She's about to be sick again
But she's basking in looks from the

Failures writhing on the dance floor
Those men - drinkin' their wages low
It's the meatiest show
Take a look at this woman
Fawning after wrong guys
So man! Understand you'll never know...
Still I persist telling: Don't
Choose your wife in bars

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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alvin rhodes - March 17, 2004 - Report this comment
words to live by....funny the original song, too...5s
Meriadoc - March 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Alvin - I knew we could count on you for what might be our only vote... :-O
mandamoo - March 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm a little hurt.... :-( Anyway........this was TOO funny, guys ! Excellent stuff ! I swear I felt like a fly on the wall ! Haha !
Jan Unwin - March 20, 2004 - Report this comment
Also...don't look for a husband in bars, though I found a good boyfriend that way once. 555
Max Power - September 22, 2012 - Report this comment
Notice how in divorces, the women were generally favored by the court. Makes you wonder...then there's the dumb prenup the husband signed without reading.
Porfle Popnecker - September 23, 2012 - Report this comment
I don't even buy my booze in bars. Liquor stores are cheaper and you don't have to associate with other people.
Agrimorfee - September 24, 2012 - Report this comment
Isn't it amazing that this kind of parody writing was occurring eight years ago? Once again, M&P shows their consummate skills have always been one to reckon with.
bobpiecheese - September 25, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) Why would anyone make that kind of life-changing decision in a bar, surely the booze would impair one's judgement! That said, holy crap, this piece of awesome is eight years old? Amazing. 555!
brightCAP - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Great alignment with the original verses! Favorite line: "She's a loud slothful cheap affair"
Abbott Skelding - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Never heard the OS before, but you did an excellent job with this. I love the "In four letter both verbs and nouns" couplet the best. I'm even willing to overlook using the same chorus twice, just because the verses (as well the choruses) were so well written. Nice work!
Matthias - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Love this original song! You really did some awesome stuff with it. Don't drink too much though because you might wind up the next morning next to David Bowie. Why does the man look like a girl in all of those photos to the right?! lol
Blaydeman - September 27, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not the biggest fan of Bowie. Don't get me wrong, I respect him a a musician, but it's just not my personal taste. However this parody is. This is so funny. Solid parody Hobbits. Solid.
Meriadoc - September 28, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks so much to the w/x'ers for this round of lovely comments and votes! It is much appreciated. :)
Richard B - March 11, 2017 - Report this comment
Full marks for keeping the original rhyme scheme. Really skilful work, and I like the way it mocks not just the girl but all the "failures" who leer at her.
Peregrin - December 30, 2019 - Report this comment
Thanks, Richard B. This reply is a little (just - ever so slightly...) late, but I am glad you noticed that. I recall Merry and I having that same discussion, mock-wise ;)

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