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Song Parodies -> "Up, I Got the Bends"

Original Song Title:

"Up Around the Bend"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Creedence Clearwater Revival

Parody Song Title:

"Up, I Got the Bends"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

I feel spaced and my head feels like blowin'.
Up too fast from the deep came I.
Lungs are frayed, lungs are frayed, must be slowin'. . .
Reach the stinkin' ship in time.

Sometime my risin' ends;
I'm comin' up--I got the bends.

Ow!
Takes so long; I don't smile; it's so damn slow.
I'm real wet and I'm frettin' good.
Bitch to rise. . .like list'nin' to "My Way."
Each turns me off; wish that I could

Come up. . .be with my friends
I'm feelin' cruddy--got the bends.

Way up yonder's the crest of the ocean. . .
I'll be fine, and I'll hit the hay.
But now I've nitrogen saturation--
Need oxygen in my Type A.

Got too much nitrogen;
I'm comin' up--I got the bends.

Ow!
Cannot rise up to quick, or it's die way;
I must creep up the big wet sea.
Got no chamber to get blood flowin';
Gotta slog, gotta slog slowly.

Sometime my risin' ends;
I'm comin' up--I got the bends.

Yow!
Scu-scu-scu-scuba,
Scoot, scoot, scoot, scoot? Naw!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

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alvin - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
especially liked the bit about "my way"...lol
McKludge - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Another reason the only diving I do is, well, I won't say...
John Barry - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Alvin, McKludge.
Tommy Turtle - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
As a turtle, I don't have this problem, and as a scuba diver (as well as a McKludge-type diver), I'm kinda' surprised at finding a scientific error in the ┼▒bermind of JAB: I've been nitrogen-saturated plenty of times, without problem. You don't need more oxygen, you need recompression so that the N that came out of solution, forming bubbles, will re-dissolve in your Type A, followed by gradual decompression to allow a slower escape rate. A 0.555 feet-per-second ascent rate would have avoided the problem. Oh,and the vote is also 555, without the decimal.

BTW, in my self-deprecating song post today, did I remember to include any reference to "pedantic?"
Andy Primus - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Good one but the story could have been given more credence if once you were out of the clear water you had stated what kind of revival technique was used.
AFW - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Nasty condition, I agree...and even worse is when you run off a bridge in your foreign car and wind up in the drink..this could give you the Mercedes Bends
John Barry - September 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks for the lesson, TT, the suggestion, Andy, AFW.
MrMacphisto - September 27, 2008 - Report this comment
This has plenty of credence (and creedence) for me... ;) 5-5-5

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