Last thing I remember was flaskin' down more wine,
For I had many drinks all in a row.
So madly I'd get fired, took each one in hand,
Drinkin' one way for gettin' slammed.

Well. I'm here to drink and how, each and ev'ry bottle done,
I'm gonna drink 'em fast, I'm gonna drink each one.
I'm always havin' my fun.

With wine and beers downed I, am I the perfect lush?
For there were many drinks lined in a row.
I gladly put away, the head left in each can,
Just one way, I'm gonna land.

Well the spirits did ker-pow, speech all slurred and blubbered dumb,
Took a header, earned a cast, I was leaded burned and stung,
On Sunday, I'll be hung.

I checked the Sunday paper, my name was printed there,
It seems of all the things they could have shown.
The O-bit-u-ary, honored mention drama did I scan,
Sayin' this day, I was so canned.

Well, if beer won't fell you now, reach for ever clear and rum,
You should never drink it fast, your head'll burn quite hung.
And Tokay makes you numb.

Think I would remember the beer I put away,
For there were many drinks on back I'd throw.
A still I see free standing, 'bibein' all I'd stand,
Such a fun day, I wondered canned.

Oh, the beer is hell and how, each and ev'ry bottle done,
I wet 'er for breakfast, I wet 'er just for fun,
But rosé makes you numb.

I'd yell all plowed, each and ev'ry drink more stunned,
My liver burns it fast, and ever burns it some,
But Tokay's strong as rum.

Tokay's strong as rum.

Mmmm-mmmm-mmmm....