Bonsoir, Monsieur Creosote, sit down in your place
You've been stuffing quite a lot of food into your face
Hare with truffles, anchovies and cream
Moules marinières, foie gras,
And eggs Benedictine

Then have a waffer theen mint
Just a waffer theen mint
Had to drink to stay alive:
Chateau Latour '45
And monsieur, do not fail
Your six crates of brown ale
Gaston! A bucket for puke.

M'sieur, regurgitations have made such a hit round here
The guests are all a-hurrying, trying to get clear
'Twas projectile, got 'em in the eye
Still, I'm sure that you can hit
That bucket if you try

Have a waffer theen mint
Just a waffer theen mint
Just a teeny-tiny one
Non? Dommage, ce n'est pas fun
It's ever so thin
Sure you can squeeze it in
It won't make you go BOOM!

I only ask what do you want: Beluga caviar
Frogs' legs, oeufs de caille, and maybe quelque chose à boire?
Served in a bucket, ain't it high-class slop
Double-load of pate, avec les oeufs frites on top

So, finish off with a mint
Just a waffer theen mint
You tell me "F*** off, I'm full"
Well, Monsieur, I'm sure that's bull
Not drinking your drink?
Why, does it make you think
It might make you go BOOM!

Hey!
Are!
You!
Eating your mint?
Your small, waffer theen mint?
Well, M'sieur, bon appetit
(Now take cover, this is it!)
He's full to the brim
What'll happen to him?
Think he's gonna go
Oh, no, he's gonna go
Oh! He's gonna go BOOM!

Monsieur, it's here
What I've got here
Yes, here is the check