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Song Parodies -> "Jack's Daughter's Fat"

Original Song Title:

"Smackwater Jack"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Carole King

Parody Song Title:

"Jack's Daughter's Fat"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

Youtube HERE for a listen to the OS of Smackwater Jack by Carol King.

Now Jack's daughter's fat,
He gets his shotgun.
'Cause she and some hill dude did a bit of fornication.
Was no condom put to use,
He just a rode on his wild goose,
He didn't think of no papoose,
So she counts down until gestation.

You better watch for this man,
Want's his daughter, take her hand.

Now Slim Jim's in grief,
It wasn't what he ordered.
But that's how the cards will run
Headin' south of border.
So he started headin' south,
But his pick-up had an ouch.
And it fried there on the side,
It leaned off the street,
Couldn't ride no farther.

Slim's gonna walk for her hand,
Jack insists Slim's his daughter's man.
Oh wo, wo, wo, wo.

An account of the nuptials,
Was in all the papers.
And you know they brang ol' Slim right then,
'Cause late gets later.
Saw the steeple and he seized,
All the in-laws said "oh jeez".
Bullet holes, I’m gonna bury your rear,
So he did so take her.

You know, you know, he stalked down that man,
With a shotgun made him stand.
(Shotgun made him stand)
Jack's daughter lacks not a husband,
Yeah, Jack's daughter lacks not a husband,
Don't Jack's daughter lack. yeah.
Bein' no Jack's daughter lack, yeah.
Seein' no a-Jack daughter lack, now.
Gave him no slack.
Daughter don't lack.
Sacked father's jacked, yeah.


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Knowing your politics, Guy, I was thinking this was a swipe at Jack Kennedy's daughter Caroline, who's always been rather thin. Thank you for NOT going that route.
Peter Andersson - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
What do you mean Michael, this is as NRA friendly as it gets! ;-)
alvin - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
funny story...5s
littleCupCakes - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir, liked the lines with: "wild goose & papoose" as they are sooo ~Great Laker~ in character. I enjoyed the adventure of Slim Jim's shotgun wedding to Jack Fat's daughter!
AFW - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Good to see ya' back, Guy....I like the new touch, sort of a redneck mob theme
stuart mcarthur - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
excellent - funny clever title sub, and perfect pacing throughout, and a story to boot - couldn't ask for more, Guy - 555
Guy - June 13, 2008 - Report this comment
Michael - Never would I show any disrespect for JFK - I liked the guy and I hated Nixon. Now you see that we see eye to eye on some things political. About three years ago I was on a business trip to Dallas. My hotel was located about three blocks from the assassination site. I gained a whole new perspective of that day by seeing it up close and personal.

Peter - Ah yes, I am sure that the NRA has been responsible for many couples exchanging nuptials.

Alvin - Yeah, funny how a shotgun can simply say it all. Thanks.

M'Lady - I am pleased that the story amused you so. Thanks.

Farce - Naw - It has more to do with my Appalachian upbringing. Thanks.

The OS is a story so I just followed along. Thanks. Stu -

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