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Song Parodies -> "I Complain"

Original Song Title:

"You're So Vain"

Original Performer:

Carly Simon

Parody Song Title:

"I Complain"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Your chili was too hearty
And not to mention, was far too hot
Did-n't believe when you said that was peach pie
It tasted like apricot
Couldn't make myself much clearer, when
I said, "This tastes like rot!"
You couldn't mask it with sauce made from tartar
Sauce made from tarter, and

I complained
Wishing that you'd made chicken or beef stew
I complain
(I complain)
Because I can't stand the things that you do
You do
You do

Oh, last night when it was time to go
Out to meet my best friend Eve
Well, I asked you to shave and to comb your hair
You're sloppy; there's no reprieve
I don't know what you were thinking of
Your shirt was so wrink-ly
Stuck to your sleeve there was chocolate and toffee
Chocolate and toffee, so

I complained
"You oughta pay somebody to dress you"
I complained
(I complained!)
"You've gotta find some pants that match your shoes
Your shoes,
Your shoes!"

(incessant whining to the tune of an instrumental interlude)

Last Halloween you dressed up like Khadafi
Dressed like Khadafi, man

I complained
'Cause we had a-greed on Winnie the Pooh
I complained
(I complained)
"I gave you the choice of Piglet or Roo
Or Roo,
Or Roo!"

When you go to bed, dude you wear a toga
Though you're no God of the Sun
And that time you pissed off all the guys at OSHA
When you screamed "Safety at work isn't fun!"
"What's with these lemons? I wanted limes!"
I'm taking off, forthwith
I gave you a try 'cause on me money you'd spend
Yeah, money you'd spend, but

I complain
I think I'd do much better without you
I'll complain
(I'll complain)
'Cause lately I have started to doubt you
Doubt you
Doubt you!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   14

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tim Mayfield - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, a classic misunderstanding on costume choices: "Cause we had agreed on Winnie the Pooh, I gave you the choice of Piglet or Roo" If someone AGREES how did it get to I GAVE YOU THE CHOICE??? Ah, the complexities of halloween. ;-) He probably woke up one morning after a nightmare and said "I'm dressing up as Piglet??? What's wrong with me?" Next time remember: a Heffalump is a much more masculine costume.
alvin rhodes - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
YOU ?...COMPLAIN ?....i find that extremely easy to believe...this is hilarious..especially the halloween costume bit...5s plus
Yet Another Dutchman - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
544. I will probably be the only 544 in a long line of 555s (except for that weird 244 rating). Ahem, enough about numbers. When I read the first verse and chorus I thought "I'm reading a food parody," but by the second verse, chocolate and toffee had taken a backseat. What I liked about this parody was that you varied the chorus, and I liked the Winnie The Pooh part as well (but had he chosen Roo, a Tigger-suit would be a much better match). And you made me expand my vocabulary with the word 'forthwith.' All 'n all a cool parody, no complaints here.
2nz - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Can't find much to complain about with this parody. Nice rhyme scheme and the OSHA stanza was my favorite. Saying "This tastes like rot" doesn't sound like you, but at the same time it's quite funny.
John Barry - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
No complaints. Fives, in fact.
Michael Pacholek - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I told you, Arwen, I was dressed as Saddam, not Khadafy! I just couldn't find the fake mustache!
stuart mcarthur - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
You've made an absolute art out of deliberately choosing wacky look-at-me odd subs (rot, beef stew, wear a toga, Eve, chocolate-and-toffee, Khaddafi, etc) and those alone crack me up - 555 - how do you spell tartar though?
Johnny D - October 14, 2005 - Report this comment
What, this you call a parody, a kvetch-fest worthy of Linda Richman? Fives for you --- now --- all you readers --- talk amongst yourselves --- here, I'll give you a topic --- " Viggo or Vin ? " --- discuss! ;-)
Arwen - October 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Tim...basically, when speaking of the men in my life, and I say that we "agree" on means I got my way. Clear things up at all? ; ) Thanks!

Alvin...thanks! Glad you enjoyed it...and I'm also glad to know that you're beginning to understand my true nature...=)

YAD...thanks very much...I'm always excited to hear that I've forced someone over to

2nz...=) I actually use the phrase "this tastes like rot" ALL the time...I don't know what you're talking about. And I'm glad you liked the OSHA part, because I know I was proud of it...=)

John...well of course you don't have any complaints...I've already used them all...; ) Thanks! realize that by claiming that this song is referring to you, that you're saying we've broken up by the end of the last verse, right? So much for "Nobody Can Forget Her." =(

Stuart...why thank you...oh, hmmm, I liked that, too...thanks so much...wha--DAMMIT TO HELL!! >=( contest...=) Thanks!
Peter Andersson - October 15, 2005 - Report this comment
My one complain here is that I don't think people should use the phrase "this tastes like rot" unless they actually have first hand knowledge of how that really tastes, and somehow I doubt that you do, but part from that I think this makes a nice addition to the soundtrack of your life that should some day become the rock opera of your life, or possibly even the movie (with VD in the leading male role).
stuart mcarthur - October 15, 2005 - Report this comment
tee hee (again) - you realise, of course, I've made this my mission in life
Peter Andersson - October 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Mission what? To get VD into your life? (Think carefully before you answer that one). :-)
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 15, 2005 - Report this comment
I only know the chorus, but this was hilariously rhymed throughout. I wish we had Halloween down here, my Tigger outfit has been gathering dust for months...
PMS - October 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Way funny. I liked the OSHA line and the toga one as well.
carol - October 16, 2005 - Report this comment
so sorry I didn't get to check in sooner and give you the 5's this parody deserved. I have been offline for the last few days;my comp got hijacked and was knocked offline. I'm so pleased with myself for being able to do my own comp maintaining.
Arwen - October 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Peter...I just want to know where everyone gets off assuming that I don't know what rot tastes like? I mean, COME ON!! Okay, I don't...but I'm a wild child...I am crazy. I say that things taste like things that I've never tasted. Sometimes I even say that things that I've never tasted taste like OTHER things that I've never tasted. I'm serious...I just live on the edge that way. Oh, and thanks...regarding the rock opera of my life...(working title: "I AM THE BEST, DAMMIT!")...I'm already working on having my people call Vin's his people finally wised up and had my number blocked... this is for EVERYONE: I will give 8 dollars to whoever can teach me to type out a convincing 'I'm rolling my eyes, you bastard' emoticon.


Luke...oh, for Hell's sake...since when does any self-respecting man need a namby pamby excuse like Halloween to dress up like Tigger? Spaff does it all the time...

PMS...thanks a bunch!! problem AT ALL that you're late...ongoing compliments just give me more to smile about...=) Thank you very much! Glad to hear that things are okay with your computer...
stuart mcarthur - October 17, 2005 - Report this comment
no need for the eye-roll (which must be like a lame nicotine-patch when used as a substitute for a full-on argument) - it's not really my life's mission, just that day's - so don't go paying me back tenfold with all my typos, okay...;-)
Yet Another Dutchman - October 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Okay, I'll give it a try: G.G
Yet Another Dutchman - October 18, 2005 - Report this comment
That was an attempt at the eye-rolling emoticon. Horizontal: eye-mouth-eye.
What the @#$%? - October 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Two triple one votes?? Chucky, please erase those undeserved votes if you can; this parody was NOT off-paced. All I can say is triple one voters need to die.
Serafina - October 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Hi, Arwen; what's up? Not much here, except for the usual. Anyway I thought this parody was wonderful, like all of your others; I must give it a perfect 5-5-5.... we do need more high scores to counterbalance any undeserved low votes.

Have a nice day! =)
Arwen - October 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Stuart...yeah, okay. Like I'd ever get on someone's case for a typo...; )

YAD...thank you for acknowledging my request. =) Your 8 dollars is in the mail.

What the @#$%?...few things make me swoon more than righteous indignation on my behalf...=) I need a man who's willing to kick ass to defend my pacing abilities...=) If I knew who you were...and um...if you were here...and if you didn't turn out to be Tech Support Fred...I would kiss you right now...

Serafina...=) Thanks a bunch...the low votes don't seem to bother me as much as they do everyone else...but that is probably because I KNOW they are only left out of jealousy of how freaking cool I am...; )

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