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Song Parodies -> "Nobody Writes Me Letters"

Original Song Title:

"Nobody Does It Better"

Original Performer:

Carly Simon

Parody Song Title:

"Nobody Writes Me Letters"

Parody Written by:

Mikey Squirrel

The Lyrics

Nobody writes me letters, makes me feel like a dweeb
Nobody writes me, 'cuz they don't want to, everybody's mean

You say you mailed them, but somehow you lose them
And tried to blame it on the mailman
You find ways to avoid me, but that just annoys me,
'Cuz even Ed McMahon ignores me too
And nobody writes me letters
Though sometimes junk mail I will get
Nobody writes me, or even calls me
Why does everyone forget?
The way people feel, when they open that seal
As if there was money in that envelope
What keeps them from writing, can't be too exciting
Why do I always feel like a dope? And


Everybody's mean, everybody's mean, everybody's mean
c copyright 2005 SquirrelbaitSquirrelbait Parody Jukebox

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   2
 5   15

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

The Pomfret - May 18, 2005 - Report this comment
This is entirely too sad to comment on.
Michael Pacholek - May 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Somehow, I don't think this is meant to be a sequel to Bobby Vinton's "Mr. Lonely."
Agrimorfee - February 21, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) short but sweet. Le'me send you a 555 to your postal box.
Matthias - February 21, 2008 - Report this comment
I pictured Charlie Brown singing this, because he's always looking into the mailbox and shouting "Drat!" I don't know if that' where you got this idea, but that's what it reminds me of.
Guy - March 01, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4N) I could actually hear Carly's voice in my head as I read this. Well done. Here's a hint. Take time to re-write the chorus instead of just putting "Chorus" for the second and subsequent Chorus verses and with a song this short you could have varied the chorus and added a bit more substance to the parody. But that's just my pet peeve. I still like the parody. The Ed McMahon ref I especially liked.
Below Average Dave - March 01, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4N) Oh, Mikey, this one, this one just seemed somber to me. . .I getting get much of a laugh out of this one. . .this is an old one by you before you got up to your current standard, sorry buddy I couldn't get into this one.
bobpiecheese - March 02, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) I agree with BAD. Nothing more to be said, really.
stuart mcarthur - March 05, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) well, when I'm laughing at the title alone, you know you've got me, Mikey. As I started reading I was thinking hmm, this could be the winner, but it was just too short (which is not your fault of course) but a hearty 555 for your funny idea and execution
Invisible Boy - March 05, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4N)Definately a great idea. I agree with Guy's comment about the chorus, but I know you realize that at this point. Don't feel too bad. The only letters I ever get are bills.
Kristof Robertson - March 05, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4N) I actually enjoyed the skewed meloncholia of this one, Mikey, but I agree with Guy about the chorus...still, this was written an age ago, and look at ya now! 555

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