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Song Parodies -> "Sod It, Hobbit!"

Original Song Title:

"Damn It, Janet!"

Original Performer:

Brad and Janet

Parody Song Title:

"Sod It, Hobbit!"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Another scene from LOTR - Merry and Pippin have just been hijacked by a band of Saruman's orcs led by the Uruk-Hai Ugluk. I guess he might have persuaded them to move somewhat along the following lines. This was written after a challenge from Matthias.
[Ugluk:]
You! Hobbit!

[Merry&Pippin:]
Yes Orc?

[Ugluk:]
I've got something to say

[Merry&Pippin:]
Uh huh.

[Ugluk:]
You'd best not try
to
run away...
So we reach Isengard
Without a delay

[Merry&Pippin:]
Oh S**t.

[Ugluk:]
The forest is wide but we'll cross it, hobbit
This orc band is mine, and I'll boss it, hobbit
So run, and don't make me force it, hobbit
I've one thing to say and that's sod it, hobbit
Run, won't you!

So try escape and you'll cop it, hobbit
You'll scream, and you'll beg me to stop it, hobbit
As I make you a "John Wayne Bobbit", hobbit
One more thing to say and that's sod it, hobbit
Run anew

Where's the ring you hairy-footed joker?
There's three ways that this can go
That's bad, worse or mediocre.
Oh H-O-B-B-It
It's time to go

[Merry&Pippin:]
Oh, why do we always have bad luck (Ugluk)
You know that your smell makes me upchuck (Ugluk)
You're really an uggerly dumb schmuck (Ugluk)
I've one thing to say and that's f**k, Ugluk, .... you too.

Ugluk...

[Ugluk:]
Oh... hobbit

[Merry&Pippin:]
We're f****d...

[Ugluk:]Grrrr...Hobbit.

[Merry&Pippin:]...so are you.
[Ugluk (together):] What I'm ****ed too?

[Merry&Pippin:]
There's one thing we won't do - ah - oo.

[Ugluk:]
And that's see Saruman who will rob it, hobbit
Which is why he gave me this job-it, hobbit
Ain't no way I'm going to stop it, hobbit
I've one thing to say and that's sod it, hobbit
****ing MOVE!

Sod it, Hobbit.

[Merry&Pippin:]
Ugluk, you're f****d

[Ugluk:]
Sod it, Hobbit.

[Ugluk&Hobbits:]
Time to moooooo-
-oove

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

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McKludge - May 05, 2007 - Report this comment
I've one thig to say and thats hey Phil, I will, give you 5's....
alvin - May 05, 2007 - Report this comment
you took a song that already pretty funny and made it even more hilarious...especially when i imagined our beloved hobbits involved
Phil Alexander - May 05, 2007 - Report this comment
McKludge - "one thig to say"? Hope the cold gets better soon
alvin - I nearly did "Touch-a touch-a touch me" by mistake ('cause it starts "Tell us about it, Janet"), but thank you for thinking this might be an improvement. I had to rewrite it when I found out that it was Ugluk, not Grishnakh, commanding that party of orcs (the rewrite was a must, 'cause Ugluk has much better rhymes ;-) )
Below Average Dave - May 05, 2007 - Report this comment
Woah. . .you are really on a LOTR kick of late eh? Anyhow, very good parody of a classic musical number. . .I guess things must be a tad better to be writing again, welcome back.
Matthias - May 05, 2007 - Report this comment
A classic parody of "Rocky Horror" proportions! I couldn't think up this many rhymes for "Damn It, and Janet" after Rocky Horror chewed all of them out, and after several attempts of parodying this song I gave up and passed it on to somebody else who had a field day with it. Bravo!
Ann Hammond - May 05, 2007 - Report this comment
he he
Phil Alexander - May 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Dave - LOTR is my fallback when I can't think of an other topic ;-)
Matthias - coming up with a title sub was the difficult bit, I agree
Ann - :-)
Thanks everybody
McKludge - May 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Danks, Phil, id's clearig up :-)

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