Song Parodies -> CuJo Shuffle
| Original Song Title: | "Lido Shuffle" |
| Original Performer: | Boz Scaggs |
| Parody Song Title: | "CuJo Shuffle" |
| Parody Written by: | Michael Pacholek |
I've wanted to parody the Boz (and I don't mean Brian Bosworth, great college football player turned pro bust turned lousy action-movie star) for some time now, but I couldn't get it right. I knew Georgie Bush was "that dirty lowdown," but somehow... Then it hit me. Don't do Georgie. Do somebody else who's failed almost as often. Curtis Joseph, the most overrated goaltender in the history of hockey! And now every hoser who ever put on the blue sweater and rooted for the Leafs knows it!
CuJo missed the puck that day he took the ice
and he ain't missed, by Toronto fans, don't treat him nice.
A Maple Leaf playoff run brief, the team, it stops
another choke, expensive joke, and CuJo flops.
Next stop, Motown, Red Wings put the money down and let it roll.
He said, "Mike Vernon won a Cup there.
Osgood, Hasek rang it up there.
I'll carry the load!"
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He's for the money, he's for the show
CuJo's always gonna blow.
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He said one more year ought to get it!
One last shot 'fore I quit it!
One more for the road!
CuJo be runnin', havin' great big fun, until he got the note:
"In the Olympics, you blew it, almost became the goat."
He be facin' all those Mighty Ducks, blowin' all those megabucks
swept and broke!
Sayin', "Sabres got me real good once
Devils twice were a hindrance
now I hit the road!"
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He's for the money, he's for the show
CuJo's always gonna blow.
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He said one more year ought to get it!
One last shot 'fore I quit it!
One more for the road!
and he ain't missed, by Toronto fans, don't treat him nice.
A Maple Leaf playoff run brief, the team, it stops
another choke, expensive joke, and CuJo flops.
Next stop, Motown, Red Wings put the money down and let it roll.
He said, "Mike Vernon won a Cup there.
Osgood, Hasek rang it up there.
I'll carry the load!"
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He's for the money, he's for the show
CuJo's always gonna blow.
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He said one more year ought to get it!
One last shot 'fore I quit it!
One more for the road!
CuJo be runnin', havin' great big fun, until he got the note:
"In the Olympics, you blew it, almost became the goat."
He be facin' all those Mighty Ducks, blowin' all those megabucks
swept and broke!
Sayin', "Sabres got me real good once
Devils twice were a hindrance
now I hit the road!"
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He's for the money, he's for the show
CuJo's always gonna blow.
CuJo! Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
He said one more year ought to get it!
One last shot 'fore I quit it!
One more for the road!
This is not meant as a swipe against the Red Wings. But if they want to win another Cup, they gotta cut the bum loose!
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This just in: To honor Curtis Joseph and his many chokes, Boston Globe sports columnist Dan Shaughnessy has named him an honorary Boston Red Sock.
This just in: To honor Curtis Joseph and yet another choke, Chicago Sun-Times columnist Jay Mariotti has just named him an honorary Chicago Cub.
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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This is view # 76
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