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Song Parodies -> "Cardinals' Sin"

Original Song Title:

"Cardinal Sin"

Original Performer:

Black Sabbath

Parody Song Title:

"Cardinals' Sin"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

It wasn't easy finding a song parody for the St. Louis Cardinals, one of baseball's most honored teams. I tried, to the tune of Tom Jones' first hit, "Stan the Man Musial, he is loved by everyone..." but didn't get much farther. I tried shortening "Cardinal" to "Card," and switching to "Hard," but nothing worked: Not "Hard Rain's Gonna Fall," not "Hard Headed Woman," not even "Easy to be Hard." Then I just hit Google up for "Lyrics Cardinal," and voila! For 70 years, 1926 to 1996, the Cardinals won nine World Series, 15 Pennants and four post-1969 Division Titles, and were nearly always in contention, with pitching, contact hitting, speed and defense. Then in '97 they sold their souls for the almighty home run as hit by Mark McGwire and now by Albert Pujols. It's been somewhat embarrassing since. (But I still think Pujols is gonna put up scary numbers in his career.)
What do you do when your closer takes over?
Do you crawl to your corner and cry?
Did you imagine the fans would not notice?
Just another game lost when you die.

Every fan is watching you, every tongue is screaming, "Fool!"

How are you dreams? Do they fall to the Braves?
Making Wrigley a place you despise?
Where is the Man, who was once your strength?
All the old-time St. Louis big guys?

Every fan is watching you, in the stands at Busch.
Every tongue is screaming, "Fool!" The Astros kick your tush.

When you lose, Cardinal sin, you make your lineup, on that you rely.
And your future's looking grim, Big Mac, you can't count on him.
Albert the child? His swing is wild.
When you lose, Cardinal sin, don't expect the fans to treat you well.
We say, "Oh, boy, you smell!"

We point the finger, lose, Cardinal sin
laugh in your face, lose, Cardinal sin
We point the finger, laugh in your face
'cause you ain't gonna get back into the Pennant race.

Oh, lose, Cardinal sin!
Oh, lose, Cardinal sin!
Aw, come on, Sharon! They're the f---in' St. Louis Cardinals, the Pride o' the f---in' Midwest!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

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