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Song Parodies -> "Creepy Mr. Jones"

Original Song Title:

"Me and Mrs. Jones"

Original Performer:

Billy Paul

Parody Song Title:

"Creepy Mr. Jones"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

It’s the “nutterfly effect”: one celebrity-seeking looney-tune crooked scam artist narcissist with a ridiculous mustache makes an idiotic pronouncement/threat and influences people and events around the world. So sad.
Creepy Mr. Jones, he’s got a stink goin’ on.
Most folks know that it’s wrong,
But his yucky pong is gonna stool out now.
This sleazebag don’t care ’bout troops over there;
His madness will make madmen flare.
Loathsome plan: baking all those Korans;
He’s a fusebox with all the fuses gone.

Creepy, twisted Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones,
Mr. Jones got a stink goin’ on.
This toad’s grotesque and wrong
And his yucky pong is gonna stool out now.
They’re gonna be extra wrathful
When they see flames, smoke in the sky.
After this doltish conflagration. . .more soldiers die.

Sleazy grifter Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones,
Mr. Jones, he’s got a grift goin’ on:
He was runnin’ a con
And he should be gone, off to the hoosegow now.
Got a tiny flock who’re believing
This turd who sucks, this scourge who sucks them dry
Of both dough and soul, how asinine.
In a furrow this creep should be placed with quicklime,
Freaky Mr. Jones, nitwit Jones, dipshit Jones.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   9

User Comments

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AFW - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
The three T's...Topical, timely, and so true..
Michael Pacholek - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
He's got the twisting of religion, the authoritarianism, the bigotry and the hawkishness. All he needs (and may already have, for all we know) is the gun fetish and the lust for tax cuts, and he'll have the full Republican six-pack.
NorCalCougaress - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Yes, ~ Yukon Al AskUS ~, Welcome back, Sir, yes, this creep is low-life for sure . . . so I ask why, Oh why is a top ~US General~ even dealing with this boar, let alone pleading with this idiot ? ? So very unPatton-like, Lord ~PalinOffKey~ ! !
Patrick - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Michael, have you see the news clips of Jones at his desk? If I know guns, and I do, that sure looks like a .45 Glock on top of his Bible. Of course, it's not like the Taliban is going to call off the war if this nobody decides not to burn a Quran. Just heard Rush Limbaugh saying that Jones was in his class (same grade) in high school, but he doesn't remember much about him except playing baseball against him on another team.
Old Man Ribber - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Bottom line: Jones - creepy fanatic...Burning The Koran - wrong, unnecessary, inflammatory...Fanatic Muslim Jihadists - murder is infinitely worse than scripture burning...Michael - Over-the-top commentator but funny writer even when I'm not agreeing...JAB - in a class by himself. ;D
Tommy Turtle - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Could you please post this as a comment at "Immoral Liberal"'s post today? Strangely Illiberal about free speech, was he... 555 here.

Word to the wise: ChuckyG long ago "asked" me (he didn't "ask") not to put off-site links in the parody lyrics, but to confine them to the intro and outro. (One reason for footnotes).If you're interested, I can tell you why, but it's easy enough to put the news-story link in the intro.

Michael Pacholek: Do you own a car? I guess you have a car fetish. A frying pan? Got a frying pan fetish, eh? ... Owning a gun does not automatically (HAHA) make one a gun fetishist.
  Typical to smear everyone who disagrees with you as a racist, or to take an entire party of diverse individuals and call them all those other names. (I don't belong to that party, FWIW). In short, you have the full liberal name-calling, ad-hominem, fact-free stereotyping six-pack. Cheers.
Christie Marie M - September 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Yeah, just found out about Mr. Jones right now and everything you said about him are true! And what's up with that giant handlebar mustache of his! Kinda like Yosemite Sam. Great as always, John!
Michael Pacholek - September 13, 2010 - Report this comment
Patrick, I have not seen his office, but if you're right, I wouldn't be surprised in the least. Tommy, in fact, I do not own a car. You're right, owning a gun doesn't make one a gun fetishist. To paraphrase our President, it is CLINGING to a gun that does that. As for Jones being a bigot, he IS one, a religious bigot. Whether he is also a racial one I do not know. And to call the Republican Party "diverse," you have a point. They have all kinds of fanatics.
John Barry - September 13, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks, all. TT, perhaps I misread IL's post, but it struck me as Swift-like satire. Thanks for the tip about links. I'll try to remember it.

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