Come out now, Hi Fat, don't let me wait.
You Chinese restaurants serve me too late.
Aw, but sooner or later, it comes on a plate.
And I'll have the Number 1.
Well, I called up the order, know it was me
'cause I said, "I don't want that M.S.G."
Aw, but I never told you how good it can be
if only it's not overdone.
You know it's only the egg foo young.

You might've heard I run with a ravenous crowd.
We tip really big and we ain't too proud.
Aw, we might be chewing a bit too loud
aw, but that never hurt no one.
So come on, now, Hi Fat, show me lo mein.
Don't gimme duck sauce, the spice gives me pain.
Aw, and keep out the werewolf who's out in the rain
lookin' for "Party of one, Zevon."
You know it's only the egg foo young.

You got a nice white tablecloth ready for my reservation.
You got a brand-new bowl and a nice egg roll.
Aw, but now, Hi Fat, they didn't give you quite enough information.
You didn't count on me when you made your fortune cookie.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa

And they say there's some good food for those who will wait.
Some say it's better, but I say it ain't.
I'd rather gorge with the gluttons than fast with the saints.
The gluttons have much more fun.
You know it's only the egg foo young.

(instrumental break)

You said your maitre d' told you I complained about indigestion.
Aw, he doesn't care for me, but he's not all there to me.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa

Come out, come out, come out now, Hi Fat, don't let me wait.
You Chinese restaurants serve me too late.
Aw, but sooner or later it comes on a plate.
And I'll have the Number 1.
You know it's only the egg foo young!