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Song Parodies -> "Homophones"

Original Song Title:

"Honesty"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Homophones"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

If you search a lexicon,
There’s plenty that you’ll find.
I ain’t talkin’ about “live” and “live”;
It isn’t such a trek I’m on. . .
Rather pairs like “mind” and “mined.”
And many others I’m about to give.

Homophones are just same-sounding words,
For example, “blew” and “blue.”
Homophones are “heard,” “herd” and “herds,” “hurds,”
And the threesome “two,” “too,” “to.”

You can always find some “one,”
Then “won”—and “eyes” and “ayes.”
There’s “wear” and “ware,” “heart” and “hart,” “leech” and “leach”—
You see them all over the place.
In L are “lies” and “lyes;
What doesn’t work is “life’s a beach.”

Homophones are just same-sounding words,
For example, “knew” and “gnu.”
Homophones, people and cheese: “Kurds,” “curds,”
And the threesome “ewe,” “you,” “yew.”

I am a ’phones lover;
They are all my friend.
In my days of “noing” them, there’s many that I’ve kenned,
And now it will comfort me to point out “mi,” and then
Go “no,” “know,” “Noh.”

Not deep or incisive, me,
It’s just that I’ve learned,
In English, regularity’s gone
When it comes to orthography.
So we have “tern” and “turn”
And that’s to say nothing of “faun” and “fawn.”

Homophones are just same-sounding words
A question hits me: can you
Call a ’phone an acronym like GERD[1]
If so there’s “gird”; also “new,” GNU.[2]


[1] gastroesophageal reflux disease
[2]Actually pronounced “ga-new,” a recursive acronym standing for GNU’s Not UNIX, GNU being a UNIX-like operating system

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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 4   1
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - August 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Who you callin' a homophone? I guess this makes you the catcher in the wry. (Sorry, Bob Uecker.)
Ausfahrt - August 10, 2011 - Report this comment
this was kinda good

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