Song Parodies -> Columbia 2009
| Original Song Title: | "Miami 2017" |
| Original Performer: | Billy Joel |
| Parody Song Title: | "Columbia 2009" |
| Parody Written by: | Michael Pacholek |
Columbia is the capital of the State of South Carolina. It wasn't the affair, it was that he left the State for five days without telling anyone -- including the Lieutenant Governor, which might have been worse than not telling his wife! It's like Keith Olbermann said about the hiking excuse: "If THIS is the cover story, how bad is the truth?" And what's the matter, Markie: American mistresses ain't good enough for ya? Some patriot you turned out to be! Then again, look how much time the Governor of Alaska spends outside HER State. At least when George W. Bush did nothing for five days while New Orleans drowned, we knew where he was!
(instrumental opening)
Argentine, the Guv went out, the wrong way.
I saw the Governor laid low.
Life went on beyond the Myrtle Beach.
They all bought boogie-boards and left there long ago.
They held a press conference at noontime
to watch Mark Sanford's tears aflow.
He told how it went down.
Drove him to a frown.
I watched MSNBC's show!
Whoa whoa whoa...
Argentine, the Guv went out the wrong way.
I saw the crazy ways he'll fail.
For five long days we did not notice him.
He wasn't hiking on... the Appalachian Trail.
He burned his bridges to twenty-twelve
like John McCain did over war.
The flames engulf ol' Mark.
His prospects looking dark.
Like Senator Ensign before.
Whoa whoa whoa...
I've seen the rats on right-wing radio
say it wasn't like Bill Clinton's fall.
The dopes forget his great economy.
The 9/11 strike... was his successor's pall.
They laughed from Atlanta to Norfolk.
"Mark, no U.S. mistress for thee?"
Back here, he couldn't stay.
Threw his career away.
And threw his party out to sea!
Whoa whoa...
Whoa whoa whoa...
You know this guy went out the wrong way.
Like Gary Hart several years ago.
Remember how he did in Florida?
Now Mark Sanford... went well past Mexico.
There are not any in his party
who keep their '12 vote hopes alive.
We'll tell the world about
the people they've sold out.
Obama's laughing at their jive...
(instrumental close)
Argentine, the Guv went out, the wrong way.
I saw the Governor laid low.
Life went on beyond the Myrtle Beach.
They all bought boogie-boards and left there long ago.
They held a press conference at noontime
to watch Mark Sanford's tears aflow.
He told how it went down.
Drove him to a frown.
I watched MSNBC's show!
Whoa whoa whoa...
Argentine, the Guv went out the wrong way.
I saw the crazy ways he'll fail.
For five long days we did not notice him.
He wasn't hiking on... the Appalachian Trail.
He burned his bridges to twenty-twelve
like John McCain did over war.
The flames engulf ol' Mark.
His prospects looking dark.
Like Senator Ensign before.
Whoa whoa whoa...
I've seen the rats on right-wing radio
say it wasn't like Bill Clinton's fall.
The dopes forget his great economy.
The 9/11 strike... was his successor's pall.
They laughed from Atlanta to Norfolk.
"Mark, no U.S. mistress for thee?"
Back here, he couldn't stay.
Threw his career away.
And threw his party out to sea!
Whoa whoa...
Whoa whoa whoa...
You know this guy went out the wrong way.
Like Gary Hart several years ago.
Remember how he did in Florida?
Now Mark Sanford... went well past Mexico.
There are not any in his party
who keep their '12 vote hopes alive.
We'll tell the world about
the people they've sold out.
Obama's laughing at their jive...
(instrumental close)
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nice bit o' bashin'
Don't be cruel......EXCEPT to this government MULE!!!!!
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This is view # 102
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