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Song Parodies -> "WalmartMan: Redone"

Original Song Title:

"Pianoman"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"WalmartMan: Redone"

Parody Written by:

Andrew D. Lacroix

The Lyrics

This is the 21st parody, with the exception of that I have done three brand new choruses. This is song 23, and I swear, this is the last time I am doing this song again for a while. Oh, I am borrowing a line from Tommy Turtle's comments where it belongs,thank you for the suggestion, I appreciate it!
It's 4 o'clock on a Saturday
The year was nineteen eighty-eight
Mr. Walton sat down next to me
He said, "Drew, isn't this job great?"

He said, "Drew, can you work this pallet for me?
I'm older than you think
Yeah maybe it's sweet
You're much more upbeat
I'm as old as that bathroom sink!"

Why did I choose to work here, you ask?
I would be paid better, I was told
What little did I know, thrown right into the show
I hope we don't get stuck in the snow.

Now Sam from afar was a friend of mine
He got me this stock for free
Buddy, this is no joke; no you better not smoke
There's no place that he'd rather be

He said, "Drew, I believe this ain't killing me."
As a smile ran wide on his face
"Well, hell I could have been a TV star
If I wanted to get out of this place."

Old Sam had a real estate business
Rarely had time for his wife
Helen, Rob and Jim, his daughter too had been
Fearing for his old sacred life

Rob wanted to practice politics
Old Sam just laid his gravestone
He should have been at home resting
Saying, "Hey, just leave me alone."

Do it again, you're the WalMart Man
Save us some dough tonight
Now I can't believe what I heard; is it true?
Did Sam Walton just die last night?

They have some pretty long lines for a Saturday
But my manager gives me a smile
Cause he knows it could be all the money he'll see
To forget about stress for a while

And the people sound like a carnivore
And the registers sound of the beep
They go to their car, bread back in their jar
And say "Damn, wasn't this trip cheap?"

Sam Walton left a long legacy
But there is just one little fit...
They don't really treat anyone right
We all should just go up and quit!
Original written October 18, 2007. Redone version written 10/23/07 by Andrew D. Lacroix. Special thanks to Tommy Turtle.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   1
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tommy Turtle - October 24, 2007 - Report this comment
Substantial improvement here, Anrew. Choruses filled out, more gags and switches. Still need to nail the pacing, e. g., (second verse, second line):

I'm not really sure how it goes =
I'm older than you think

Parody is two syllables short. I agree with taking a break from this song for a while -- maybe practice on shorter, easier songs, and come back to this later. btw, I have some shortcuts that help check pacing and help nail it -- you can PM me if you're interested (and thanks for the nod). 444
P. S. - October 24, 2007 - Report this comment
Meant to mention that your parodies of this OS reminded TT that he's never done one... wrote a "Piano Man" parody, that will probably post here Friday; if not, next week. Thanks for the inspiration!
Agrimorfee - October 24, 2007 - Report this comment
I'm more troubled by the continued duplication of so many of the OS key words than the pacing.
Andrew D. Lacroix - October 24, 2007 - Report this comment
Tommy, Agri, thanks for the comments. Yeah, again, was rushed, because I did a second parody (Strikin' Out), and not much time before work. Tommy, I borrowed your line on a whim, hoping you wouldn't get ticked (some people I know get ticked off if you borrow a line) and I appreciate that. Again, Agri, it's not perfect, I might give this one another go once I have taken a break from this song. Maybe I'll let something bad at work happen and I will want another stab at this song. "Second Shift" was just a joking version of the OS because those were people I work with. Tommy, I may take that course you offer, email me gravebrave_10@yahoo.com, introduce yourself as Tommy Turtle from Amiright so I know who you are. I'm looking forward to your version of the OS.
TT - October 25, 2007 - Report this comment
OK, gimme a couple of days to put it down nice and neat and short and sweet. Hectic schedule tomorrow, but will email you not later than the weekend, I hope.

Never offended at someone taking a suggestion -- that's very flattering :). Taking a line from someone else's parody and claiming it as your own would be nasty, but you didn't do that. We often give each other song ideas etc. here.

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