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Song Parodies -> "(The Things That Are) Annoying To Me"

Original Song Title:

"She's Always A Woman"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"(The Things That Are) Annoying To Me"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

Okay, this should be more relateable than my last one.
[intro]

Telemarketing calls,
During my dinnertime...
Televangelists' 'faith',
And of course those damn mimes!
Sound of rubber that's peeled,
While I'm trying to sleep
(And) The whine of a child,
Well these things are annoyin' - to me

To get s*** on by doves,
Anything made from tofu!
When you ask for the truth,
Some continue to snow you
There's the 'flavor' of liver,
Last sheet of TP
And the stain from a beet,
Well these things are annoyin' - to me

No!....,
No more litterbox smell!...
No more reading small fonts!
No more standing in lines!...

NO!.....,
When the cable goes out...
Poison ivy rashed skin...
When it rains through the night...

When I hear someone snore,
When we start tourist season
When a paper edge cuts you,
Blow snot while you're sneezin'!
When I cram for a test,
And the grade is a D
When I'm told 'go to hell',
Well these things are annoyin' - to me

[humming part, but if that's annoying skip it]

No!....
No more dust on the shelves!...
No more airing re-runs!...
Dumb dogs barking all night!...

NO!.....,
When the money goes out...
Faster than it comes in...
And that raise was denied...

When swimming I find,
There is piss in the pool
When I wake up from sleepin',
I'm covered in drool
When my day is predicted,
By ass-trology
If the stars were aligned,
They could see my behind!,
And that's always annoying - to me!

[humming outro]
copyright 2006+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 22

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   22
 22
 22
 

User Comments

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AFW - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Very well done...in sort of a "Few Of My Unfavorite Things" style..top fives
Johnny D - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
What AFW said --- excellent job, Red Ant.
carol - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
you have my vote of three 5's on this one.
Agrimorfee - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
This isn't annoying.
alvin rhodes - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
masterfully written
Adagio - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL! Jack, nothing wrong with reruns though, especially if they're X-File reruns. 5's (So cute, I'd like to print it out).
MasonR - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Great job on this one!
Arwen - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Lots of funny stuff...although my favorite line came early: those DAMN mimes indeed. And I, for one, love it when people tell me to go to hell...hehehehe.
Red Ant - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks AFW, Johnny D, Carol, Agrimorfee, Alvin, Pat, MasonR and Arwen.

Pat: Print this out? Feel free.

Arwen: Just a few hours ago I got some new (weak) slams thrown my way: Lame and Leech (capitalized no less). More inventive than go to hell, so I loved it. Go to hell is just so... pathetic.
Larry Hensley - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Amazing parody, so funny, 5's
Stephen Harrington - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
555, good. ^__^
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
I most be one of the very few people on this planet that actually likes the taste of liver (liver, potatoes and onions, ahh...) but I kinda agree with most of the rest. :-)
Michael Pacholek - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Ant: You know what makes me want to clobber people? Bad parodies of Billy Joel songs. You're quite safe. And, by a weird coincidence, when I got to the part about dogs barking, wouldn't ya know it, I heard one start up. Arwen: As Billy Crystal has taught us, a mime is a terrible thing to waste. Another comedian, Steven Wright, likes to put a blank tape in his VCR and turn the sound all the way up, just to drive the mime next door crazy. Every time I see one, I'm tempted to ask, "Who is this clown?"
Red Ant - February 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Larry, Step-chan, Peter and Michael.

Peter: Liver was more of a convenient rhyme than an annoyance/dislike.

Michael: At first your comment had me worried, but I'm glad you liked this one since you are the resident Billy Joel afficianado here.
Agrimorfee - March 16, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3) Like I said 1 year and 20 days ago.
Wolverine - March 16, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3-T) Excellent. Very funny, and all very annoying (subjects, not the parody of course).
Michael McVey - March 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Good answer to "Things that provoke (Cat's) ire", and a parody of the same songwriter to boot.---MM
Max Power - March 23, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC - LOL
Matthias - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
"If the stars were aligned they could see my behind" with lines like that this paordy is far from annoying to me
bobpiecheese - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3-T) To add to the list: When the neighbours have a kareoke night (they canna sing, cap'n!) and my brother. All in all, awesome parody!
Jason - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) Very top stuff.
Cat - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) I do agree with Michael in the sense that it does remind me of a certain work of my own...even if this one predates it! Anywho, I absolutely loved this, some brilliant subs in there, and I agree with Matthias on how great the "see my behind" line is.
Stuart McArthur - March 25, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) wow - fantastic Jack - I just read it to the OS, and you pretty much rhymed each last syllable to the OS throughout - plus great wordplay (ass-trology) and witty detail - loved it - 555
Johnny D - March 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
Rick C - March 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) Great parody, Jack! TMGLTM but "ass-trology" was a great idea. 555 :-)
Kristof Robertson - March 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) Although annoying things is a well-trodden thematic path here at Amiright, this shows so much quality it deserves all the kudos it recieves. Sterling work. 555
Arwen - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC...I still love Love LOVE this...but I have to say, for the record, and in all seriousness...that I LOVE a rainy night. Especially if there is thunder!!
Jeff Reuben - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
This was brilliant, I loved the mime line because Matthias' recording is still in my head. Great job fitting all these things into the song.
Jack Wilson - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
Loved it, loved it! 5s
Red Ant - April 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Aggy, Wolverine, Michael McVey, Max, Matthias, Pieman, Jason, Cat, Johnny D, Rick, Kristof, Arwen, Jeff and Jack!

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