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Song Parodies -> "It's Santa, Man...(The Office Party)"

Original Song Title:

"Piano Man"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"It's Santa, Man...(The Office Party)"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

I know it's only the start of December, but I thought I'd get in early this year. Picture the scene; a guy in a puke-stained, tatty red suit, with a bottle of discount bourbon in hand, sits at the piano...
It's nine o'clock and it's Christmas Eve,
My office party's pretty wack
There's a young man photocopying
His bare ass and his red yuletide sack

He says "Dude! Merry Christmas!" and carries on
I'm staggered, and quite at a loss
Coz he's loud and he's drunk; he's an arrogant punk
And sadly, he's also my boss

Fa la la, fa-la-la
Fa la, fa-la-la, faaa-laaa

Ho freakin' ho, buddy! It's Santa, man!
Tangled in festive lights
What a mad, bacchanalian symphony
Of broom closet shaggin' and fights

Now John from accounts has got mistletoe
And eggnog stains down his pants
And he's pursuin' Sue, who's adept at Kung Fu
If he wants a fat lip, here's his chance

I.T. Bill's the DJ, and he's groovin' hard
But his songlist's quite Manilow-esque
If he plays one more Cliff Richard Megamix
I'll staple his ears to a desk

Fa la la, fa-la-la
Fa la, fa-la-la, faaa-laaa

Now Paul, the VP: Janitorial
(He owns his own bucket and mop)
Is earning his bonus with quickness, not slowness;
He'll sing 'til we pay him to stop

As the Marketing guys form a conga line
Mr Lee downloads hot reindeer porn
Well, if Jesus could see how we celebrate
He'd have second thoughts 'bout being born

Ho freakin' ho, ladies! It's Santa, man!
Come sit on Santa's lap
That's the line I use on all the secret'ries
So mostly I just get a slap

Now I've blown my big chance with young Natalie
Who I wooed through the night, acting cute
Coz some fellers dared me to climb down a "chimney"
And I got stuck in the rubbish chute
The cold buffet's left over from Halloween
And the beer doesn't taste much like beer
Well, I've just decked the halls with disgorged Tootsie Rolls
And I'll do it all again next year!

Fa la la, fa-la-la
Fa la, fa-la-la, faaa-laaa

Ho freakin' ho, buddy! I'm Santa, man!
I need your sympathy
Because Holly and Ivy and Melody
Won't unwrap their "presents" for me

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   4
 5   11

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tim Mayfield - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Delightful. Creative. And quite funny too.
Huff - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
The pacing seemed a little off to me, but then again it's been a while since I've heard this awesome song. However, it was funny as hell. 5's for all but the pacing, which is a 4.
carol - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
pacing is off a little, but the creativity makes up for it 455
John Harvey - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
That's pretty awesome. Pacing is off, but it's still incredibly amusing! Way to go!
Kristof Robertson - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks for the votes! There seems to be consensus that the pacing's a bit off....I'd be interested to hear from you where you think this is, coz it scans pretty well to me. PM me and we can have a lively debate! ;-)
Arwen - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
I stumbled on pacing a few times, as well...but this was, over all, just FAN-tastic. "And sadly, he's also my boss…" was CLASSIC!
alvin rhodes - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
brilliant..especially like the "fa-la-las"
AFW - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Zany and artful ...the way a christmas party, and parody, should be...five copies
Rex - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
More well-twisted lines from a well-twisted mind... party on, Kris!
John Barry - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Joël Noel. Love it. 5s
Jeff Reuben - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
I didn't realize you worked for me that year =P Brilliant!
Matthias - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Red Ant - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
If the pacing is off I couldn't tell, then again since BJ's Greatest Hits is like 35$ it is still at the store instead of inside my CD player. Great work, BoTD on the pacing. 555 PS- Reindeer porn? Nevermind....
Michael Pacholek - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
As the biggest BJ fan on the site... I mean, the biggest Billy Joel fan on the site... I wholeheartedly approve. After all, I love songs about Christmas, I dig songs about Santa Claus, and I just adore songs about elves. Don't I? Don't I???
John Jenkins - December 02, 2005 - Report this comment
'Tis the season to parody Santa Claus. Well done, Kristof.
stuart mcarthur - December 02, 2005 - Report this comment
reminds me of one of my favourite dark movies, Bad Santa, with Billy Bob - LOL at Cliff Richard megamix - I too stumbled on pacing but I know you too well to think it wouldn't be syllable-perfect to the OS - more fuel for my neverending argument that pacing can sometimes be TOO correct (for us less-than-perfect OS knowers) - btw I don't know why you acted cute to win natalie, when you could have romped home with a dose of BS astrological...555
Ravyn Rant - December 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Nothing says Christmas like an open bar, eh? Our holiday party is tonight. I may have to send a link to this page to all of my co-workers. Great job!
Rick C - December 05, 2005 - Report this comment
TMGLTM here. Wonderful job! 555
Kristof Robertson - December 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Again, thanks for the votes, folks! Stu raises a very interesting point re pacing. I'm pretty pernickety about pacing (I think I have just made that word up) so I went over this again and again to make sure it scanned damn near perfect. And guess what? It does end up a bit clunky, just like the OS. Mr Joel has a tendency at times to squeeze phrases a bit; I thought I knew how the OS went until I sang along with BJ's recording.
So, there ya go...I'm sure I was trying to make a point here, but I'll be buggered if I can remember what it was. ;-)

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