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Song Parodies -> "Hooked Up with a Bigfoot"

Original Song Title:

"Big Shot"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Hooked Up with a Bigfoot"

Parody Written by:

Spaff.com

The Lyrics

Well -
You left Portland riding in your Cherokee
Into Mount Hood National Park
You stopped for drinks with the tall girl you met
Off the road in the dark
Oooh -
But when you wake up in the morning with your hair on fire
And you're tied face-down from a tree
You know it's no urban legend
The same thing happened to me

'Cause she turned out to be a Bigfoot - creature
You should have known from how she growled
She's def-nit-ly a Bigfoot - creature
'Cause your teeth are all knocked out
You had to stay till last call - last night
That will teach you to get plowed
You thought you'd met a strong babe - not quite
You hooked up with a Bigfoot - last night
O-o-oh no-o!

BLEAH!

Well -
You were so impressed with the great Northwest
How the women seemed aggressively game
Like the hottie with the bushy brown hair
Who just grunted her name
Ohhh -
But now you just don't remember all the things she did
And you're not sure that you want to know
I'll give you one hint, buddy
Your Jeep ain't all that can't go

Yes! Yes! She had to be a Bigfoot - creature
Clumps of leg hair falling out
Undoubtedly a Bigfoot - creature
Her perfume was Rainbow Trout
You almost had your last rites last night
Got Sas-squashed into the ground
You should have known her grip was - too tight
You hooked up with a Bigfoot - last night

O-oh -
Grunt grunt grunt grrrowowowowl
Snort snort snort shn-o-o-ort
Ook ook ook howowowowl
Aargh grrrb roar

It's no big sin to let your groove kick in
If it saves you from camping alone
But were you totally blind?
She picked at FLEAS while she carried you home

No no no no no no you didn't bleeve in Beegfoot, deedja?
She seemed a-bom-na-bly endowed
She had to be a Bigfoot - creature
'Cause your limbs are all yanked out
Your picture's in the news - nice ass bites!
Guess you've silenced all the doubt
You woke up with a rug burn - shag type
You hooked up with a Bigfoot - last night

Oh -
Grunt snort snort grrrowowowowl
Ook grrrb roooar
Ow! Bigfoot!
Bigfoot!
Bigfoot!
HEY!
Mmmm-Bigfoot!
OH! NO!
...Bigfoot...

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 31

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   1
 1
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 5   30
 30
 31
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tim Mayfield - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Spaff, glad to see you submit a non-Pink Floyd parody. This is fabulous! I think you've found the missing link.
Steve K. - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Yep, gotta be careful which girls you pick up, especially if they can pick you up.
Olvan The Terrible - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
This parody cracked me up. Rarely do Amiright songs make me laugh out loud, but this one did. May I suggest a sequel? "Bigfoot Strikes Again," to the tune of that Smiths song.
alvin rhodes - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
funniest one i read today...5s plus
Jeff Reuben - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent song! Why does the girl need to be tall? =)
2nz - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
"All men [who go in Forest] die out years ago."
"Well, what did they die of?"
"Crushed pelvises."
Pan to male skeletons with crushed pelvises and BIG smiles.
-Futurama

Hilarious, Spaff. ANd it makes a great story for a bar.
Know 1 can hear you philosophize - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
If a man speak (or sing) in the forrest, and there is no female bigfoot around to hear him, is he still on the wrong track?
John Jenkins - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Very well done with a lot of good lines, particularly the rainbow trout line.
Johnny D - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
If a man blows his nose in the forest, and there is no booger to dislodge, does a female bigfoot tune in NPR on her pepperoni pizza?
Phil Alexander - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but this is kinda funny. Been there, seen that, got the flip-flops ;-)
Ravyn Rant - January 05, 2005 - Report this comment
"Sas-quatched"? I'd give you fives just for that! BTW - Elves Gone Wild showed up a couple of days after Xmas, but I made my Spawn listen to it with me anyway. We both enjoyed it immensely. Thanks!
Jakc Wilson - January 06, 2005 - Report this comment
LOL! I love it! Ahh I hope I strat recording parodies soon! Anyyways awesome as usuall 555!
mac - January 06, 2005 - Report this comment
:-)
Leo Jay - January 06, 2005 - Report this comment
Good lord. "last rites last night", "sas-quashed", "abominably", "rug-burn -- shag type".... Funny concept, inspired puns and brilliant substitutions for the original lyrics.
Spaff.com - January 06, 2005 - Report this comment
Tim: I promise no more Floyd for at least a week or so. We don't need no Yeti nation.
Steve: Heh heh. I shoulda picked up on that.
Olvan: Sweetness!
alvin: Thanx plus.
Jeffaroo: Tall, dark, and hamstrung.
2nz: So THAT'S where I stole the idea.
PeterchyP: It depends what the definition of "is" is.
Johnkins: It's "The Scent of a Wildwoman." Hoo-ahh.
Johnny DD: It depends what the definition of "pepperoni" is.
Philbo: I thought you looked familiar.
Ravyn: AFTER Xmas? That's lame. Email me: spaff@spaff.com
Jackie: I'm looking forward to hearing them.
mac: Back atcha.
Lee OJ: Always nice of you to stop by THIS part of the site. When you gonna submit a parody?
Tim Mayfield - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, now if you're talking "Just Another Brick In The Wall", that might be ok, maybe "Just Another Neanderthal"

We don't need no Yeti nation
We don't need no homo-trolls
No ectoplasm for Bigfoot boom
Leave their DNA alone
Won't you quit messing with their bones
All in all it's just another neanderthal
You've gone too far and made another neanderthal
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Once again my gratuitous lack of musical appreciation means another DKTOS ruining your parodies, as I sing my own unharmonious melody along to your sassy rhymes. You should do Eamon's "F*** It, I Don't Want Chewbacca".
Stuart McArthur - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
don't mind him Spaff - although he's my ryman
- I mean COUNT-ryman
I loved it (and thanks Luke for inspiring that gag)....this would make a good video - especially the part where you establish that her odour was Rainbow Trout - 555
Steven Cavanagh - January 09, 2005 - Report this comment
Fine, fine form, Spaff. Sas-squashed, Rainbow Trout, excellent stuff. Great concept, well developed. 5 big toes.
Jack Wilson - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Listened to his recording yesterday, its awesome!!
Spaff.com - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Tim Mayteardownthewall: Niiice job. "If you don't eat your date, they won't track any footprints. WHY would they track any footprints if you don't eat your date?"
Ralphing Luke: But then they'd have to bleep out all the growls for airplay.
Stuartiste: I met an Aussie Sheila the other day and told her she had a lovely country.
Stevenagh: Sorry I didn't get a Chewbacca joke in there for you.
Jackie: Your support is awesome!!
Chub - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Spaff, I'd give you 5's just for the "rug burn - shag type" line. But then I'd feel slightly dishonest if the rest of the song wasn't worthy of those lofty scores. Fortunately it was, so you spared me the moral dilemma. And you know how I hate moral dilemmas. Excellent, as always.
Spaff.com - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Yeah, Chub, you've always had a knack for picking the supposed moral side of moral dilemmas. Regrettable.
Jack Wilson - February 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Im trying to think of a Big Shot parody, but I cnat think of one Only ides I had was "Bald Spot"
Michael Pacholek - February 09, 2005 - Report this comment
How the hell did I miss this one? (Probably the same way that guy didn't see she was a Bigfoot, didn't see.) This one was almost perfect, but missed by a hair. (I can't believe I used that joke again.) Now ya done it, Spaff, now I gotta write a Bigfoot parody.
Spaff.com - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Jackie: I see that you did one in your Year in Review 2. Nice. I had "Bitch Slap" on my to-do list, but probably won't bother with it now, so it's up for grabs.
Michaelopedia: I'm looking forward to it. Lemme know when you submit it.
HERE'S ROBERT LUND'S RECORDING - August 19, 2008 - Report this comment
http://www.spaff.com/poesy/bigfoot.html
littleSAScakes - August 19, 2008 - Report this comment
To the Staff @Spaff: I thought BIG-FOOT was a 'he' ? This is somewhat ~TontoEsque~ . . . cute !
Spaff.com - September 10, 2008 - Report this comment
So did I, littleSAScakes. So did I.
Jack Wilson - September 19, 2008 - Report this comment
New recording of this is awesome!
Dr Music - September 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Great song. I would love to see an animated video of it.
Spaff.com - October 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Jackie: Thanks!
Dr Music: Me too.

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