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Song Parodies -> "Hillary Rodham Clinton"

Original Song Title:

"City Of New Orleans"

Original Performer:

Arlo Guthrie

Parody Song Title:

"Hillary Rodham Clinton"

Parody Written by:

Bob Gomez

The Lyrics

Writing songs pro-Hillary Rodham Clinton...
Hil's presidential, come November 8th!
Blasted past the blasted past glass ceiling--
Done with thumpin'
Trump in all three debates!

This Her-storic Clinton odyssey
Began pre-Bill-and-Hil, you see,
Well before she studied law at Yale--

True, Benghazi, what a mess--
(Kind of like Lewinsky's dress)
And the weak leaks of the thirty thousand emails!

"Good voting, America, now stronger!
No thanks to Comey,
Time to stay as one!
I'm the brain, they call me Hillary Rodham Clinton--
I'll appoint three leftie SCOTUS in my eight-year run!"

Crazy war games with the Kremlin and its Trump card--
Paris Accords, combating climate change!
Pass reforms for legal immigration--
Seal the deal, up the minimum wage!

And the sons of Muslim voters
And the young transgender queers
Join Latinos, blacks and moderates at the polls--

Mothers with advanced degrees,
(Splitting votes, half-GOP),
Now they're turning all the red states purple and rose!

"Good voting, America, now stronger!
T. Rump can blow me,
Whiny, lame-ass grump!
I've got brains and balls, I'm 'such a nasty woman'--
I'll support free four-year college if your name's not Trump!"

Nighttime, and as CNN's reporting:
Dow Jones average surging as we speak!
Meanwhile online trolls and tweets get boring--
Time for Putin and Assange to jump in Lake Wikileak!

But all the crumbling Rust Belt towns,
And jobless folks feel beaten down,
Pointy sheet males voted David Duke--

And though we ignored both Pence and Kaine,
We'll remember this campaign
'Cuz Ivanka's dad made all his daughters puke!

"Good fight, America, now stronger!
Tea Party's over,
Aren't we great as one!
I'm the brain, they call me Hillary Rodham Clinton--
I'll be smoking legal pot when he concedes I won!
Let's all smoke some legal pot when he concedes I won!"
┬ęBob "I Wrote 28 Campaign Songs, And All I Got Was This Stupid" Gomez 2016

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.7
How Funny: 2.4
Overall Rating: 2.5

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   12
 13
 12
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 3
 4
 
 5   8
 5
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Righty - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
And you played to a largely Republican audience with obvious results. Geez man, could you be any more liberal?
John Jenkins - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
It is sadly true that Ivanka's dad is making a lot of people puke, but it is also sadly true that Chelsea's mom is doing much the same. Particularly with the 'Benghazi/Lewinsky/weak leaks' verse, this is a very good parody even though your optimism over Hillary's presidency seems unenlightened.
querty - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
"Pointy sheet males" as Trump's base. Very nice. So half the country are murderous racists, are they? You should probably cool it with the all the KKK references, lest people start figuring out where the true bigotry exists.
Patrick - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
"Herstoric" election, indeed. Though perhaps the unemployed voters in decaying rustbelt towns may not get all that excited over gay weddings and pot smoking Muslims. Hillary's campaign is deliberately exclusionary, and if the sheetheads don't necessarily represent us, well you don't either.
Deplorable me - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
I wish you luck today, Mr. Gomez, but you now have five negative comments that do not support your view for Hill and her other half Billy. IMHO it is said sometimes that it is "better the devil you know". This go around I'm going with the "devil you don't know". HRC's record speaks for itself and it's all bad. Her opponent, so far only has a big mouth. I'll take these odds any day. So far I see no negatives for Trump.
Bob Gomez - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks everybody, for the votes and comments. I've been posting here since the Tong Dynasty, and I remain committed to the traditions of the great American left: women's right to choose, a well regulated banking system, immigrants' rights, equal opportunity for all races and religions, LGBQT-friendly, environmental activism, free trade with negotiated restrictions, respect for international norms and laws...I could go on. Suffice to say that I enjoy crawling out of my foxhole and sitting in a tree behind enemy lines. Okay, peace out, gotta go water my "vegetables"--heh heh.
Translation - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
Women's right to choose- murder of the innocent unborn. A well regulated banking system- pandering to Wall Street and corrupt institutions. Immigrant's rights- to violate our Southern border, bring drugs into this nation, to kill innocent civilians, and promote both violence and terror. Equal opportunity for all races and religions- welcome ISIS and Sharia Law, condone Black Lives Matter police killing motives. LGBTQ- friendly- immorality and death of the sanctity of Godly marriage. Environmental activism- promoting false theories of Global Warming, trying to destroy the coal industry and it's workers, and pushing liberal Green policies. Free trade with negotiated restrictions- opposition to common sense Fair Trade deals. Respect for international norms and laws- globalization agenda subjecting United States citizens and soldiers to foreign powers and their laws. Now you can go on Mr. Gomez... move on to three decades of Hillary and Bill Clinton's scandals, lies, and ruination of this nation. Where is Whitewater, super predators, adultery, Benghazi, unsecured cell phone and private server, destruction of emails, pay for play, the corrupt Clinton foundation, lying to Congress, the FBI, the DOJ, failed Iran policy, failed Iraq policy, inability to beat ISIS, and the blood of the Benghazi murders on Hillary's hands? If she could not solve all the problems she whines of in thirty years of public and government service, what makes you think she can do anything in 4-8 years? She's strictly Obama third term. The country at 70% does not agree with that direction. Obviously, you live in liberal fantasy land content with the left-wing establishment. Go smoke more pot.
Bob Gomez - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
Wow. Enjoy your stay in Canada, I guess. I'm not doing this, in case you haven't noticed, for the votes. I do enjoy hearing what you have to say, regardless of your politics. Glad to see we can agree to disagree like thoughtful rational human beings. Later, I'm off to a victory party. Oh, and maybe see you at the inauguration? I'll be the pot-smoking rainbow hijab-wearing transgender biracial Iraq veteran with the Mazel Tov cocktail!
William Tong Dynasty Survivor - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment

Tong was the biggest hack on the site. He'd inflate his vote count and allow for no commenting. True blue liberal complete with censorship. He wielded controversy but did not want to defend what he wrote since he did not authorize reader comments. He also had an originality issue. Every "W" parody he wrote he managed to get "[p]Resident" into the lyrics. Talk about tired writing...

I guess in a few hours it will all be over. Your parody is well written. Pacing spot on as is usual for you but it's just not my cup of tea. You have always written well, but this parody leaves me flat.
Bob Gomez - November 08, 2016 - Report this comment
Sorry about that, WTDS, try again tomorrow. My fave writers were always Spaff and Claude Prez back in the day.
Two Words - November 09, 2016 - Report this comment
You lose.
Trumpeteer - November 09, 2016 - Report this comment
Start packin' Gomez, DEPSQUAD will becoming for you.
Onslaught - November 09, 2016 - Report this comment
BG, good for you man, you don't let it get you down. Haters are gonna' hate, I know, I've had my share. Water off a ducks back and all that. Keep up the good work. Peace out, man. http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/gilbertandsullivan132.shtml
Agrimorfee - November 09, 2016 - Report this comment
To quote Bill, Bob--- "I feel your pain." Better luck next time, if there is one for us all.
John Lomain - November 09, 2016 - Report this comment
Hillary really was the only option this time. Dumb electoral vote. Anyway, good parody
Guy - November 11, 2016 - Report this comment


Bob,

You and I have known each other on AIR for more than a few years. When I was in the US military I did not have to agree with what someone (within the law) said or believed but I was duty bound to protect their right to say or do whatever to the cost of my own life if necessary. I haven't worn the uniforn since the very early 1990's but I still believe in this sense of duty to my fellow Americans. I completely support your right to believe as you wish. We are suppossed to be a free society backed up by our constitution. My political affiliation is independent but I lean to the right more than not.

I find it very troubling that Trumpeteer and Two Words are so arrogant, gloatful and ugly as their comments read. I haven't written anything since 2012 and I used to like being among the political minority on the site. Mostly everyone on the site respected me amd I respected them. I've seen a lot of ugly stuff from the right on this site. From my point of view this is embarassing. What has become of the AIR that I'd known and love.

It took a lot of guts for you to write this parody and the premature Hillary win parody that followed this one. I was the guy who said many times after bring hit for things I wrote and if you remember I always disclaimed it by stating that I take full responsibility for what I write. You are that guy now. Good for you, Bob.

As for those gloating right wings, I have the utmost disdain for their attitudes. Not all of us conservatives are gloating, ugly and vindictive. I feel your pain brother but we live in a nation of laws. It's what nakes us unique from the rest of the world. I spent enough time overseas and no other nation can hold a candle to what we have. You have my respect and my support to not only be tolerant, but to also embrace your right to be whatever you wish.

Hang in there. I felt as you must 8 years ago. I got over it and I have faith that you will come out the other side just fine. Ciao.

Holy Harry - November 11, 2016 - Report this comment
^ Lo! And the windbag Messiah-elect hath used the personal pronoun "I" 23 times in His sermon on civility and social justice. He speaks, and the angels sing/Or am I breathing music into ev'ry word...

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