On my first big trip to NASCAR
I was deafened by roars from the track.
There were Chevies and Fords and Pontiacs
And the southerly-jacked maniacs.
When it ended I looked at the winner’s car
And saw no broads for the champ.
Just dudes from Jimmy Joe’s old pit crew
No bleached-blond with-the-hot-pants-tramp.

I’ve been thru Daytona on a course with no dame
I saw Jimmy Joe cry, what a shame.
In Daytona, the track will ruin your frame
And the bad Southern boys are to ones to be blamed.
Duh duh, duh duh duh duh duh, duh ta duh, duh duh.

After 5 laps in the asphalt sun
I was dreaming of chicks all the while.
Like a hotshot with an eager gun
High-speed cars, T & A are my style.
But imagine my grief and my fuel-less fun
When I had finished my last brutal mile.

You see I’ve been thru Daytona on a course with no dame
I saw Jimmy Joe cry, what a shame.
In Daytona, the track will ruin your frame
And the bad Southern boys are to ones to be blamed.
Duh duh, duh duh duh duh duh, duh ta duh, duh duh.

So I think I’ll, join the PBA
and take-my-anger-out on those ten pins.
I’ll start balding and gain some weight OK
I’ll be a NASCAR fish without fins.
But at least I’ll, have the biggest balls
to impress the new chicks on the block.
My new nickname, will be Dick Underalls
By the way my balls hang when I walk.

You see I’ve been thru Daytona on a course with no dame
I saw Jimmy Joe cry, what a shame.
In Daytona, the track will ruin your frame
And the bad Southern boys are to ones to be blamed.
Duh duh, duh duh duh duh duh, duh ta duh, duh duh.