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Song Parodies -> "Takin' Out Zombies 101"

Original Song Title:

"Take A Chance On Me"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Abba

Parody Song Title:

"Takin' Out Zombies 101"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

THE CLASS: Eliminating Reanimated Flesh-eating Ghouls...YOUR TUTOR: Professor Kristof...FORMAT: Singalong
(Take 'em out, take 'em out, take-a take 'em out out
Take 'em out, take 'em out, take-a take 'em out out)

When the dead all rise, better take advice
There's a chance you'll be...takin' out zombies
If you wanna do your best, listen up my friend
If you shoot 'em in the chest, they get up again!

When you're all alone, and your street's a combat zone
In a jam you'll be....takin' out zombies
Whatcha need's a good head shot, hit those cranial nerves
If you're not to accurate, you'll end up hors douvres!!
Takin' out zombies.....(Moosh that cerebral cortex)
Takin' out zombies

Don't try to punch 'em, It's time for luncheon
And you look good for snackin'...
If you're feeling ready, grab that machete,
And get your dumb-ass hackin'....chop 'em up real good!
Don't aim for a leg or arm
It will not do 'em any harm...they're lifeless!
If you've got a gun or sword
Just knock out that spinal cord
If you don't, you're screwed....then a zombie, too!!

Now your girl don't speak; she's a rav'nous freak
No ma-tri-mo-ny...she's a damn zombie!
And although you loved her so, wedding plans you made
Tell her that she's got to go...with a hand grenade!

So your boss ain't well? C'mon mister, can't you tell?
Categorically...he's a boss zombie
He has got that vacant stare and his skin is blue
Better bash him 'round the head with your VDU...
Takin' out zombies...(C'mon, give me a break will ya?)
Takin' out zombies...

The city's torn up and burning; kill points you're earning
Just like your Playstation
You're feeling so groovy, it's like a movie
With real mutilation!...Where's your PPK?
Look at that traffic cop; he looks like death warmed up
He's lurchin'
It takes just a single bite to really f**k up your night
So be careful dude....and do not get chewed!

And the list goes on, it's your Uncle Ron
And your Aunty Bea; yeah, they're both zombies
Guess you won't be getting no birthday gifts this year
So you've got a clear conscience and a big ol' spear

If you're all alone, and the towns a combat zone
Take a tip from me...now's the time to flee
If you've done your very best, cut your losses now
You're too easy to digest as some zombie's chow!

Da da da da da, da da da-da-da
Better you than me, takin' out zombies
Well I think I've said enough, go and have a ball...
Just don't get yourself holed up...in a shopping mall!

Da da da da da, da da da-da-da
Better you than me, takin' out zombies.....

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 22

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   22
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User Comments

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John Barry - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
An excellent tutorial.
Johnny D - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Is the subject matter fleshed-out more thoroughly in the corpsebook, er, I mean, coursebook?
Know 1 can hear you dream - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
"Take a tip from me...now's the time to flee". I'm taking a wild guess that you've been watching the great remake of "Dawn of the Dead". Personally, I was once bitten by a Swedish song parodist and now I'm rotting away here at the keyboard, guess that makes me sort of a zombie too. :-)
Jeff Reuben - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Night of the living dead part 26. JD got the corpsebook line...I'm coming up empty on the puns right now so I'll just give him props for that one =)
Tim Mayfield - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Kristof, the parody was missing a section that was on my ABBA cd, but I know they had reissues galore on their stuff, I figure you used a different one than I have. Everywhere else it was perfect. Nice work.
Kristof Robertson - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks all!! John: you're an excellent student.....JD: hehehe, very good!.....K1: It's the Danish song parodists you gotta look out for!!....Jeff: Yeah, he's quick off the mark....Tim: Thanks for your support; I'd be interested to know what missing lines you've got- email me! Bye y'all!!
Ingeborg S. Nordén - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Clever rhymes and subject choice, decent pacing....5-5-5.
Steven Cavanagh - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
This song kills! And the songs it kills get up and kill!
Kristof Robertson - January 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Ingeborg and Steven!!
Arwen - January 20, 2005 - Report this comment
Kristof...I recently watched "Shaun of the Dead," which was freaking HILARIOUS!! (much like this parody!) Check it out if you haven't seen it yet...and enjoy some fives, too!
Sweet Indigo - January 20, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks for the advice, I'll remember it for the next time I come into work and find people lurching about dumbly even after a coffee break. I do work in a scientific institution after all... And everyone knows the real reason for the Human Genome Project was to turn people into zombies :) (555 for your 101!)
Know 1 can hear you dream - January 20, 2005 - Report this comment
Steven: Your comment: LOL!
Stuart McArthur - January 20, 2005 - Report this comment
we're revisiting old girlfriend territory again, I presume, Kristof - a rich vein indeed to sink teeth into (oops wrong horror genre) - brilliant as usual - 555
Wolverine - March 16, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3-T) You get 555 PPK. Great song.
Agrimorfee - March 16, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3) You touched upon many aspects of zombie-lore in this tune--a great song choice, btw. I don't know what PPK and VDU are exactly, but I got the gist of it.
Kristof Robertson - March 16, 2007 - Report this comment
Agri: VDU: Visual Display Unit- better known as your computer screen PPK: as in Walther PPK- a German semiautomatic pistol, most famously used by Adolf to take himself out of the picture
Wolverine - March 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Ahh, Thanks Kristof. I assumed it was Points Per Kill (the song did mention a Playstation).
Michael McVey - March 21, 2007 - Report this comment
I thought that was Snape's class.---MM
bobpiecheese - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3-T) I don't like zombies...especially on games when you're used to shooting people in the leg and killing them, then you shoot the zombies in the leg, and you think it's dead...but then it's crawling towards and it scares the living crap outta you! Anyways, great parody, 555, blah blah blah.
Jason - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) You are far too good for your own good at this Kristof! Im running out of 5s to give you! 555
Cat - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) IT'S SOME FIVES!! They're out of the grave and hungry to eat up any bad scores!

Brilliant, brilliant stuff, Kristof.
Max Power - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC - Great
Stuart McArthur - March 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) do you mind if I print 3 copies of this off for my kids, Kristof? - because there's some very sage advice there that would probably get them out of pretty much any zombie situation (thanks mate, it would be a LOAD off my mind) - reads perfectly to the OS playing (whose pacing is a litle quirky) so I saw no missing verse - great and funny stuff
Rick C - March 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3T) You've captured the feel of all of those zombie flicks here, Kristof. Well done! 555
Matthias - March 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Of my my Top 10 of yours, but there's so many good ones to pick
Johnny D - March 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above, MWUAH-HAHAHAHAHAAA!!!
Red Ant - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3-T) My first visit to this parody. I loved "(Moosh that cerebral cortex)" and the "punch 'em/luncheon" rhymes. A PPK won't take out a zombie though: use the flamethrower or shotgun. ;) Fun stuff, 555.
Arwen - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC...I was going to reference the "Shaun" movie again...because it's seriously so freaking funny...and I looked up and had stolen my own comment. Dammit. But this is still a treat...love it!
Jack Wilson - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
It;s that time of the season, she's not there....oh wait not those zombies, 5s
Jeff Reuben - March 28, 2007 - Report this comment
Good to see that you brought this song back from the dead...
Christie Marie M - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
This reminds me so much of this South Park Halloween episode where the boys go trick or treating with zombie Kenny and they decapitate all the zombies left and right with their chainsaw. It also reminds me of those Freddy and Jason movies as well. Anyways, I loved the way you wrote this parody, especially adding the background vocals in the beginning of the song. I also love the OS.

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