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Song Parodies -> "Logorrhea"

Original Song Title:

"Mama Mia"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Abba

Parody Song Title:

"Logorrhea"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

In this parody, I'm poking fun at, not my penchant for trenchant, though trifling, truculence; nor for tendentious tendencies; nor for alliteration, assonance, and attempted allegorical allusions; nor for homophonic-hotshot illusions; nor for political potshots; nor for my sicness [sic]; nor for my lickerish litanies of venereal vicissitudes; but rather for distended, sometimes diatribal, digressive dilettantish dictional discourse disguised as dithyrambic ditties. (That said, there's an extra line in the second verse and a couple extra syllables in the next to the last line.) I've probably overdone it with the footnotes, but since this thing is such a stretch, I thought I'd overcompensate, just in case.
I've beaten partitions with my cranium,
Trying to find rhymes for, say, "titanium,"
Why just say "cow"? Anglo-Saxon spurned;
Latinate mates like "bovine," or "ungulate" roll
Off organ of vocal control.
Just one book to a desert isle I'd bring--
Brobdingnagian's[1] the book--the big ling[2]. Logos.

Logorrhea,[3] bons mots[4] oglin',
My, my unabridged, I kiss you.
Logo-reacher,[5] brawned: "osculation,"[6]
My, my bibliolatryst[7] [sic], whew!
I'd be thrombosed, infarcted
If home on shelf I'd parked it
High, high, where's my not-spare libretto.
Logorrhea, in peso netto
High, high is the tome I can't let go.

I would be pissed and triste[8] if I were restricted to
Monosyllables, syllogistic logic too.
Enamored I am of metaphor
Miscible[9]. . .diambs not iambs[10] adore.
Why use a short word when you can use one that's long?
The line above, I went wrong:
Twelve single syllables--a verbiage kink.
Verbose otiose[11] versicles[12] on the blink. Loco.

Logorrhea, it's quotidian[13]
I try diurnally[14] to use
Logorrhea; span meridian--
Night-night: nocturnally I snooze.
I've broken (hyphen-
ated)
Paroles;[15] hiati[16] mated:
Tied, tied--th'elision[17] isn't my foe.
Logorrhea, volubly me say
"Sky high"; my sub, "empyrean."[18]
Logorrhea. . .vault you see 'neath clay:
Mine; might try "subterranean."

"Diarrhea of the mouth," my fan
Cries I exhibit when I shmooze.
"Pyorrhea-afflicted[19] I am"--
Lie, lie--verity I abuse.
When I've spoken or charted
Prose, prolixity's[20] started.
I try prodigiously to forgo
Logorrhea's antipode,[21] so go (see ya)
Bye! I dodge "hodgepodge" for "farrago."


[1] gigantic
[2] linguistics
[3] incessant and often incoherent talkativeness or wordiness
[4] clever remarks; literally, "good words"
[5] tongue; "logos," Greek for "word"
[6] kissing
[7] play on "bibliolatrist," one who is overly dependent on books
[8] sad
[9] mixable
[10] iamb: short-long metric foot; diamb: short-long-short-long metric foot
[11] functionless
[12] little verse
[13], [14] daily
[15] words
[16] Latinate plural of "hiatus," a gap
[17] elision: omission of a vowel at the end of a word when the next word begins with a vowel, with the two words run together, e.g., "th'omission" for "the omission."
[18] heaven
[19] inflammation of the tooth sockets
[20] wordiness
[21] opposite

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   1
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 1
 
 5   5
 6
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin rhodes - March 29, 2006 - Report this comment
not sure which was more mind-bending...the song or the description
John Barry - March 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks for hanging in there, Alvin.
Larry Hensley - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Brilliantly eloquent parody!
Red Ant - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Reading this parody reminded me of playing Balderdash, which is a good thing. I gave you 5s, though in all honesty I have no idea what the heck this is about. Fascinating word-play: I bet you do crossword puzzles in ink, heh heh. Just one question: Are "Diarrhea of the mouth" and "Logorrhea" synonymous?
LucidLupin - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
good god...! 5s
Tommy the Ink-Xword Turtle - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
#$%&! Been working off and on for a week on a song I submitted an hour ago; thought it would introduce "elide" to AIR; catch up on yesterday's posts that haven't seen yet, and you beat me to "elision", plus completely upstage my now-"also-ran" "me-too"-ism. Should have submitted earlier - "You snooze, you lose". My hat and shell are off to you, Sir.

BTW, do you wanna get together and hatch a plot to destroy the entire world?
Peter Andersson - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
Dammit, I wanted to check this out because it was ABBA, but I'm gonna have to save it for my summer vacation, that's how long I predict it will take me just to look through words and read through it. :-)

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