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Song Parodies -> "A 'Seven' would be just fine"

Original Song Title:

"Heaven is in Your Mind"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"A 'Seven' would be just fine"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Surprised that this fine OS by Traffic has never been used on this site before...well, now it has...BTW - I wrote an extra section of parody lyrics to the repetitive parts of this song because I wasn't sure without listening exactly how many times they repeated the sames lines...I'm rather fond of that extra section so I am putting that down in the "Bottom Comments" section for your enjoyment...I thought about just including them in the parody itself and explaining that I liked the way it brought the story to a close...but I also really liked ending it with "the guy on my left just farts"...which is really what goes on late in one of those seemingly endless poker games.
{Card Shuffling noises for opening intro}

Playing stud poker with guys from the bar
'Six', 'nine', and 'ten' I have been dealt so far
Then an 'eight' of diamonds; my very next card
All I need now is a 'seven'; a 'seven' would be just fine
Sit in my chair as I wait for the deal
Wear 'poker face'; shield my hand to conceal
Now here comes my last card; my thoughts do appeal
"Come on, please, give me a 'seven'; instead, I pick up a 'nine'..."

{more card shuffling noises in between sections}

Stuck with a 'pair' now; I squirm in my seat
Glancing around me; am sensing defeat
If I call with this hand I am surely dead meat
Wish that I had drawn that 'seven'; instead of this lousy 'nine'

{card shuffling noises again}

Curse and I swear as I toss in my cards
losing at poker to drunken retards
Drinking too much first was not very smart
Glance at the clock, it's eleven; the guy on my left just farts

{More card shuffling noises, voice of the dealer calling out the cards he has just dealt each player, various coughing, hacking, sinus-sniffling, nose-blowing, farting, belching, swearing, etc. sounds out to end Fade}
EXTRA LYRIC SECTION - READER MAY ADD TO THE END IF YOU WISH:Clown with a pair has just raked in the pot/Smoker is choking; he blows out some snot/ Right now this room is unbearably hot/The long drive home I am dreadin'; I sure hope I don't get stopped...

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

stuart mcarthur - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
the Las Vegas World Poker Champion 2005 beat 1000 entrants and comes form a sleepy seaside town just south of Melbourne, my home town. He's been on all the talk shows, and I tuned in to see this guy, but even he didn't know how he won the 20 million - just dumb luck, and I believe him - pricked a few pretensions for me - nice work, Paul, although count me in the DKTOSs - 555
Paul Robinson - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, Stuart, appreciate it...It's really a shame more people aren't acquainted with Traffic - they really were a fine group...Steve Winwood, Dave Mason, Jim Capaldi, Chris Wood...lotta talent there.
John Barry - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
"Sevens" will get you fives. Thanks for the ideas, Paul. I'm working on a Traffic jam.
Paul Robinson - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks back to you, JB...when I first thought off trying to use some Traffic songs I really didn't think they would carry much material...totally wrong on that count...I think my "Traffic" parodies are some of my best stuff to date...and they sing out quite well, too...I'm still looking at a few more of their tunes at present...have a couple of very "early stage" possibilities...
Adagio - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
It DOES play this case Traffic is good for you. They did sing "The Low Spark of High Heeled Boys", right? 5's.
Rick C - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Great OS and parody, Paul. 555
alvin rhodes - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
clever concept, though at first i thought it was about a guy who lowered his standards when it came to women...5s
Paul Robinson - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Adagio...yes, they did indeed do "Low Spark..." I've been looking at that as well as some of their others for more material. Rick C - Agreed on OS...and thanks! alvin - hadn't considered that aspect...heck..."7" ? for a lot of guys that would be RAISING their

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