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Song Parodies -> "I've Flattened a Cone Now"

Original Song Title:

"I Think We're Alone Now"

Original Performer:

Tommy James & the Shondells

Parody Song Title:

"I've Flattened a Cone Now"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

Driving depraved
Indiff'rently and in all weather
In my Chevrolet
I'm a big block man
And now I'm
Gunning engine fast as I can
Openin' up those carburetors and
Tire-ing those treads away - put it to flight
And then acute alarm surrounds me
Hear a thump and then I frown
And then I see

I've flattened a cone now
Too many tall point-y barriers abound
I've flattened a cone now
The little shards of orange are all spread around

(Wump wump Wump wump Wump wump Wump wump)

Don't run away
They just stand right there all queuing
In bright orange array
They haven't a clue

And so I'm
Stunning 'em as fast as I can
Demolition in palm of my hands
Swerving to send them all into a flight
And then a certain calm surrounds me
No speed bump this time around
'Cus then I see

I've flattened a cone now
Those little buggers under my car I plow
I've flattened a cone now
The council sets 'em up and I knock 'em down

(Wump wump Wump wump Wump wump Wump wump)

I've flattened a cone now
On pavement now there's orange microdots spread round
I've flattened a cone now
I knocked one in the river and watched it drown

I've flattened a cone now
If no one's there to hear, do they make a sound?
I've flattened a cone now
There's bleeding witch's hats prostrate on the ground

I've flattened a cone now
They've really gone from convex to concave wow!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

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Johnny D - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
After I give you these 5's, you'll be hearing from Beldar and Prymaat. <:-)
alvin rhodes - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
very the wump wumps....
Birgitta - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
This sounds like me,lol...GJ
Midas - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Hooray! A song about cones. I've been there, done that. ;-)
Adagio - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job.
Rick D - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
I use these at work. You get a very interesting effect if you sing through one in front of a microphone.
Steven Cavanagh - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
They make great party hats, too.
Jan Unwin - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Got one caught in the wheel once. 5-5-5
Beldar Conehead of Remulak - February 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Merry - Pippin - Earth humans of indeterminate gender - Prymaat and I approve of your humorous assemblage of syllables and phonemes. Well done. If you had constructed these sound patterns in our French fishing village of Remulak, we would have insisted that they be recorded on fine compressed petroleum binding polymers and then offered in exchange for mass quantities of small discs of precious metals and assorted rectangles of cellulose imprinted with images of deceased Earth politicians. Meps.
Mari D - February 25, 2004 - Report this comment
A parody about cones... that's something that you don't see everyday. LOL!
Does anyone remember a late-night bit, probably on SNL, with an "ad" for a highway cone placement school? Or was it a bad dream?
Peregrin - February 25, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't, but there are very good reasons for that!
mandamoo - February 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Not familiar with this song, but it really gave me a good chuckle ! I have, in fact gone A over T on one....don't ask me how......:-P
Johnny D - February 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - nope, it wasn't a bad dream, it was indeed an old SNL "ad"-sketch! They showed guys, if I remember correctly, all wearing hard-hats and sitting in a classroom while the instructor, also wearing a hard-hat, stood up at the front of the class by a blackboard or a flip-pad or something like that. On the board/pad was an image of a highway cone, and the instructor was pointing at it with a pointer, while the students looked on earnestly and took notes. Then they showed the guys, with hard-hats on, in the back of a pickup truck, being trained out on the road. The truck would drive along slowly and the student would drop a cone off the back - the cone would fall over onto its side, and the instructor would shake his head and make a notation on a clipboard. The voice-over went something like "You too can now be a part of the exciting world of cone placement."

To this day, when I'm driving along and we go by some place with a lot of highway cones, my wife will invariably make some quip about "the fine art of cone placement", in reference to that silly old SNL sketch!
Paul Robinson - February 27, 2004 - Report this comment
A Smash Hit!
Marianne E. B. Markham - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Congratulations! You have just failed your driver's test! j/k of course. Yeah a parody about cones is definitely something you don't see everyday. The wumps were funny. I like it. Kickass!
The Great Karlando - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Oops...I was thinkin of "booby" cones. After getting over the original disappointment, I found a way to give ya a few fives. Good job.
George Clay - May 13, 2011 - Report this comment
YES - I remember the cone placement ad....I have been trying to find a video clip for a while on the web - but unsuccessful! "Get ta Conin'" :-)

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