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Song Parodies -> "Don't Belt Yourself"

Original Song Title:

"Just Help Yourself"

Original Performer:

Tom Jones

Parody Song Title:

"Don't Belt Yourself"

Parody Written by:

Alvin Rhodes

The Lyrics

some folks are lacking mental health
they often try to hurt themselves
the smallest things make them askew
belt themselves
black and blue
that's not something you should do

they beat themselves repeatedly
they are in need of therapy
cause if you practice self abuse
baby, i'm...telling you
you will end up...all bruised

don't belt yourself in the lip
you'll do harm
this is absurd and so perverse
don't belt yourself
in the gut
with your arms
your socks have opened up some sores
you swing like hell
with your fists
balled and curled
you let 'em fly right in the ribs
don't belt yourself
in the hips
i'm alarmed
this isn't any way to live

a pinch ain't good enough for you
you like it rough and painful, too
you twitch and stomp and pull your hair
tufts, you clutch
in despair
your emotions are bare

don't belt yourself in the lip
you'll do harm
this is absurd and so perverse
don't belt yourself
in the gut
with your arms
your socks have opened up some sores
you swing like hell
with your fists
balled and curled
you let 'em fly right in the ribs
don't belt yourself
in the hips
i'm alarmed
this isn't any way to live

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Larry Hensley - January 18, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but good parody.
John Barry - January 18, 2006 - Report this comment
I can just see Tom singing this while the crazed audience remove their belt and throw them on the stage. Great job.
AFW - January 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Good message and advice...five notches
alvin rhodes - January 18, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks larry john and AFW
Red Ant - January 18, 2006 - Report this comment
I, hurt myself today
I did it with a belt
I, focus on the pain
And all the pretty welts

... not. ;-) 555.
alvin rhodes - January 18, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks red ant...or is that black and blue ant ?

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