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Song Parodies -> "Name is Jack"

Original Song Title:

"Paint It Black"

Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Name is Jack"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

At least my last name isn't Schitt.
[intro]

I go by Red Ant but my parents named me Jack
It isn't short for John my name is really Jack
I know it's not unique as far as first names go
But as a part of speech its useage always grows

I'm driving in my car and *pop* I get a flat
Pull over grab the spare and don't forget the jack
Naive or concerned have asked "Hey, Jack you off today?"
Some don't find it funny, I just laugh at what they say!

I play a round of cards the dealer deals me jacks
Small metal pieces and a ball well that is jacks
My name's a crime on a plane, a greeting no easy act
I'll tell you to say "Hello" and never shout "Hi Jack!"

I'm skilled in various jobs and assorted tasks
The "Jack-of-all-trades" joke is gettin' old real fast
If you search hard enough you'll surely find more puns
But please not Jack Miov as that is overdone!

You see a big man and start thinkin' lumberjack
If one is clueless they are said to not know jack
I hear that one sometimes but still I stay composed
My name IS Jack, jackass, so Jack I really know!

Hmm hmm hmm ...

Everything's related
Came from Jack!
Jumpin' Jacks!
And Jack Sprat!
Jack and Jill had some 'fun'!
Jack be nimble oh my!
All the jokes I take them, take them, make them,
Name is Jack!
Ack!

Hmm hmm hmm ...
copyright 2006+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 43

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 1
 1
 
 2   2
 1
 0
 
 3   1
 0
 1
 
 4   2
 2
 2
 
 5   38
 39
 39
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Adagio - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
I never thought so many uses could be used for a name! My favorite is the 'overdone' one...I never heard it before, or one that I would probably yell without thinking 'Hey Jack, you off today?' : D Smilingly give you 5's
John Barry - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
This is fanjackstick! Fives.
AFW - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
This deserves to be jacked up high...for funny content..ceiling fives...
carol - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
sharp and witty. 555
Michael Pacholek - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
So do you belong to a union, Jack? (Sorry, the other good ones were all taken.)
alvin rhodes - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
you think YOU got problems ??????...this is a unique and amusing parody...and by the way, my dad was a "john" who went by "jack"
Stephen Harrington - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
555, funny it is. I got called Steve Urkel from time to time, but my name doesn't have many, if any rhymes or wordplays to it.
Red Ant - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Pat, John, AFW, Carol. Michael, Alvin and Stephen.

Pat: I have a reply for that line you quoted but cannot put it in comments here. ;-)

Michael: The answer is no but the people I work for have been called jack-booted thugs by some.

Alvin, the only play on your name that comes to mind is Alvin & The Chipmunks. Besides, I have the double whammy of possessing red hair (which was VERY red early on.. that spawned a ton of jokes too) Was your dad's dad also a John?

Stephen, yeah, more plays on Steve than Stephen. The worst I can think of is Effin' Stephen, which actually kind of has a cool ring to it.
Johnny D - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Extremely clever, Red Ant --- 5's for the parody, and now, a trivia question: who was "Red Jack" ?
Red Ant - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Johnny D. As for the question, I'm not sure but I'm guessing that might have been a nickname for Jack the Ripper (or some other deviant type) or possibly a pirate's name. AmIRIght?
Kristof Robertson - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
BRA-freakin-VO, Antman (yes, I'm gonna continue to call you Antman...;-)) This is sublime. 555+
Johnny D - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Nickname for JTR is correct!
Red Ant - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Kristof and Johnny D.
Adagio - February 04, 2006 - Report this comment
Jack...you said: "Pat: I have a reply for that line you quoted but cannot put it in comments here. ;-)"

NOW I'm curious! What is it? hehe
Chris Bodily TM - March 08, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM -- LMAO!!!!!! Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.... After searching countless parodies (half of which I DKTOS), I have finally found it, the top contender for February SOTM overall. It was a tough call, I almost gave this distinct to "Quailing" before I got to read this. I am absolutely impressed! 555 You didn't Jack off with this one.
Agrimorfee - March 09, 2006 - Report this comment
So, Red Ant, how's your radio station been doing... www.jackfm.com? :) 555 for the self-deprecation alone.
Curiosity Killed Me - March 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) WOW, Red Ant. One of your best ever. I'm going to be looking for puns in everyone's names from now on, starting with my own name for this comment...can you guess who's commenting? ;)
Matthias - March 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Wow... I never knew one name could have so many meanings... I'm amazed, well it's snack time... Let's see... I think I'll have Apple Jacks!!!
Tommy Turtle - March 09, 2006 - Report this comment
I am really plugged into this, Jack! 555
Adagio - March 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM06) Aready voted and commented. One of my favorites.
Phil Alexander - March 10, 2006 - Report this comment
If helped by another, would that be your co-Jack? That wasn't very good... guess I'll have to jack it in. Had you considered AC/DC for a sequel to this one?
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - March 10, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) How come it became Red Ant and not Red Jackal then, I wonder? As for Phil's comment about AC/DC I'm pretty sure he's thinking of "She's got the Jack", a song from the 70s by them. Also, there's a Queen song (or Freddy Mercury solo) named "Jack talking".
Rex - March 10, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This is really funny, one might even say jack-tastic.
Max Power - March 10, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM-Excellent!
Stuart McArthur - March 13, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) excellent, Red - especially the whole of the jack-of-all-trades verse - 555
Confission - March 17, 2006 - Report this comment
jack is short for john? well, that's good. it's nice when people take complicated, confusing, multi-syllable words like "john" and shorten em. anyway, excellent parody
Dumb Ass Kid - March 18, 2006 - Report this comment
[SOTM] Really enjoyed this one, superb 555
bobpiecheese - March 23, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I know there's a lot of uses for the word 'jack'. My fave is 'to know jack all'. Never heard TOS, found it, and WOW! Cool song! Which made the parody even better.
Kristof Robertson - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above. Truly inspired, Mr Fletcher...(can I call you Fletch??)
wannabemustangjockey - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM - I would say this is jacked up, but it's too good for that. I like it.
Larry Hensley - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Nice one, 555's
Larry Hensley - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Nice one, 555's
Johnny D - March 31, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above, & Live Long And Prosper.
Arwen - April 01, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM...LOL! This is FABulous, Red Ant...definitely on my short list!
Red Ant - April 04, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Chris Bodily TM, Agrimorfee, Cat, Matthias, Tommy Turtle, Pat, Phil, Peter, Rex, Max, Stu, Confission, DAK, bobpie, Kristof, Jay, Larry, Johnny D and Arwen.

Phil: No I hadn't, though with all the puns everyone left I probably could make one.

Cat: I can think of only a few puns involving your name

Peter: My first thought was "Back in Black". As for "Red Ant", see my soon-to-be replaced bio for that.

Bobpiecheese: Indeed, it is a cool song. I'm glad you took the time to find it.

Kristof: Yes, you can call me "Fletch", which is my more formal/work nickname, though I've grown fond of "Antman".
FEBRUARY 2006 SONG OF THE MONTH - April 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Second Place
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php/topic,17754.0.html
Curiosity Killed Me - April 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Oh, c'mon, Red Ant, there are more than a FEW...I've got your tongue!
FiFi - August 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Not trying to rub it in, but what about jack-in-the-box, jack-o-lantern, Lumberjack, Lumberjack match, and Jack-off? : ) 555 2 u, Red Ant (or, Jack)
Spoof-Man - September 05, 2006 - Report this comment
Jack,jack,jack, I can't mak um' as good as you Red Ant...oh wait Jack Black!!!! Hehe!!
Red Ant - September 12, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks FiFi. I did get in the last three you mentioned, and the first gives me an idea.

Thanks Spoof-Man. I haven't gotten the Jack Black reference... yet.
FiFi - October 07, 2006 - Report this comment
This is an offensive one... Michael JACK-Son.
Jack Wilson - October 31, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL this is awesome! Altough coulda put Jumpin Jack Flash in there too
Spaff.com - January 23, 2007 - Report this comment
I would have commented on this earlier if I wasn't so jacked up. Great Schitt. One of my fave moments from The Muppet Movie: "Jack not name. Jack job!"
Rick C - March 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) You think Jack is a tough name? How about Dick? Especially when your father's name is Dick...you, of course, become little Dick. People are always firing off their little witty lines, like, "Hey, if you twisted your ankle, would you have a limp, Dick?" Actually, nobody has ever said that one, I made it up as part of a comic bit I've never used.

Enough about me. This is a wonderful parody about your name, Jack. It flows so well with the OS, I think Mick Jagger should re-do it using your lyric. 555
Below Average Dave - March 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Well, Jack, I think it's a great name for great puns--and you brought them all to one place. My name isn't nearly as fun, I mean what can I do with it--King of the Hebrews? At least with Below Average Dave, I have BAD which is different, but "Hey Jack you off Today" that will never happen to me. . .well not in an innocent matter anyway. . .well done.
Queeny - October 29, 2010 - Report this comment
Well done, very entertaining.
Andria - October 29, 2010 - Report this comment
Excellent job... I got puns on my name where people replaced "And you're a..." with my name in stuff like "And you're an idiot/moron/profanity or hate speech" a lot from middle-school on through now, got called "Handjob" a lot too. Jack would be a hard name to live with, but it's a great drink too, neat or with tonic, if it comes out of the black-labeled, square whiskey bottle. 5s.
Mung Mung the Great - November 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Mate that had me laughing so hard I think I broke a rib. Great use of your name.
MadameDeTokeVille - November 10, 2010 - Report this comment
L' ANT Rouge, Sir, I hope that you add this tag to your list, Sir !

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