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Song Parodies -> "Ryan, Atheist"

Original Song Title:

"Cryin' in the Rain"

Original Performer:

The Everly Brothers

Parody Song Title:

"Ryan, Atheist"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Faith is the worst curse of mankind, as the exact antithesis and enemy of thought.—A.R.
It’s no theocracy
advocated by Mitt’s pick for VP.
Couldn’t abide
having God on his side;
off the Lord he has kissed,
’cause he is Ryan, atheist.

He’s a man who has got eyes
for a Russkie dyke who said faith is lies.
And so, ergo,
he must think that it’s so,
though he’s/she’s no Communist.
But she is Ayn, atheist.

True, she wasn’t a Red ’un,
but in one way she was like the Commies
’cause she wasn’t tethered
to notions we’re together
posthumously in heaven
with brothers, sisters, daddies and mommies.

Because she said God is dead
that chick had no religiosity. . .
in that way, not unlike Reds.
And she gave good Fountainhead. . .
a dreadful script foisted off on Gary [Cooper].

Since he’s endeared of her philosophy,
he too must sneer at religiosity.
But so many have missed
that he is Ryan, atheist.

For Ryan Ayn’s the one,
two peas in a pod ’neath indifferent sun,
Since he’s in her school,
he must eschew the yule.

Fakes a face with a Janus twist,
but if it’s that, it can’t be this.
You’d have to be a dualist
to worship as a catechist
and worship Ayn, atheist
(“Of thought, faith’s the antithesis.”)
Note, “Ryan,” anagramatists,
is “Ayn R—for the mill, grist.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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lifeliver - August 30, 2012 - Report this comment
Great OS, you got some good mileage out of an esoteric topic. 'She gives good Fountainhead' and esp. all last verse. The anagram was a nice touch. I'm not American and take only a cursory interest in the political circus people call participatory democracy, but I know who Ryan and Rand are. Not a lot of contributors could have done this, certainly not me, lol, so kudos.

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