I don't want to soil the potty when I go
So I'll put the toilet seat down really low
For women all complain
That they sit on a stain
And everytime you do, they let you know

I've had a drink or ten to quench my thirst
And I feel my bladder just about to burst
So when I go in there
I'll act like it's a chair
Next thing that you know I'll lug a purse

I don't want to have a fight
In the bathroom
So I'll tell her that she's right
In the bathroom

I don't want to soil the potty when I pee
And there's no one that's as feminist as me
And when it gets too hard
I'll whiz in the back yard
And write my name on every wall I see