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Song Parodies -> "Mary Cheney"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The 4 Seasons

Parody Song Title:

"Mary Cheney"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

It's no secret that Mary Cheney, the Vice-President's daughter (and advisor to his campaign) is gay. Dick Cheney himself has brought up her homosexuality in campaign speeches. John Edwards referenced her orientation in the vice-presidential debate, and Cheney thanked him for his remarks. But from the furor over John Kerry's comment about Mary in the third presidential debate, you'd think that Kerry had thrown open the Cheneys' closet doors. The Right is outraged. The Left is outraged at the outrage. Sing along, won't you?
Mary Cheney
Mary Cheney

Ma-a-a-a-a-a-ry Chay-ay-nee
(Mary Cheney)
Ma-a-ry - did you come out tonight?
(Come come - come out tonight)
Ma-a-a-a-a-a-ry Chay-ay-nee
(Mary Cheney)
Ma-a-ry - were you outed tonight?

He - made - you - come out
(Come out)
In the third debate
(Come out)
Why'd he cross that line?
(Come out)
You're lesbonservative?
You must think Bush is fi-yi-yine!

Ke-e-e-e-e-er-ry bay-ay-bee
(Kerry baby)
Ke-er-ry - made a bad move tonight
(Dum-dum! - Dumb move tonight)
(Dum-dum! - Dumb move tonight)

You-oo-oo better face her ma-a-ma
(Lynnie Cheney)
Te-ell her - if she's gay it's all right

Hey - let's - all - come out
(Come out)
Turn bi-partisan!
(Come out)
It's a gay old time!
(Come out)
Got some red-red action!
Blue - me, baby, blue my mi-yind!

Spa-a-a-a-a-are me, Chay-ay-nee
(Bush and Cheney)
Spa-are me - your amendment's uptight
(No fun - fun with the Right)
(No fun - fun with the Right)
Mary Cheney?
Mary Cheney?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 20

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   17

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Arwen - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm somewhat surprised to be the first one here. Where the hell is everyone? Don't tell me you have lives on a Saturday...

Anyhoo...I liked this, Spaff. 5s, of course. The original is one of those songs that stays in my head for, I'll thank you in advance for giving me the tools I need to be THE most annoying girl at the football watching party tonight...=) You're such a blessing that way...
Ashkicksass - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
I do NOT have a life this Saturday. And I am one of the Lefties who are outraged at the outrage. It's like they're TRYING to find things to bitch about. Whiz-bang job Spaffy.
Airfarcewon - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Enjoyed much..especially liked attention given to detail, such as syllable can almost hear the melody while reading it. Good write!
John Barry - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
I wonder who popped her Cheney? Great job, spaff.
Michael Pacholek - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Considering that Mary brought her girlfriend to the VP debate, practically shoving her in the GOP's hypocritical face, I'd say that the Democrats have the donkey as their symbol, but the Republicans are being the braying asses.
Johnny D - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Wonderful as always, Spaffaroonie. 5's.

'Twas brillig, and the slimy Rove,
Perspired and pimpled with the phage;
All flimsy were the Bush retorts,
Skull & Bone's wrath outraged.
Ingeborg S. Nordén - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Well-paced/rhymed, topical, good use of innuendos without going TOO far...5's all round!
Paul Robinson - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Spaff-tacular stuff, as usual, Sir...5's...5's for sure...say, is Mary Cheney related to Daisy Chainee? I saw her in a movie once (or more)...Johnny D - nice "mini-parody" there in your comment. Is that from "JabberGeorgie"?
Claude Prez - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
For the love of God, PLEASE tell me there will be a recording (I know you don't know, but my fingers are crossed). The song matched up perfectly throughout. Lesbo-riffic.
alvin rhodes - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
funny one...5s
Michael Pacholek - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Republican hatred of gay men is called homophobia. Republican hatred of gay women is called Xenaphobia.
Adagio - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment is your definition of homophobia:
Main Entry: ho·mo·pho·bia Pronunciation: "hO-m&-'fO-bE-& Function: noun Date: 1969 : irrational fear of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or homosexuals

Where does it say REPUBLICAN hatred?
Know 1 can hear you dream - October 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek: "Xenaphobia"! Great pun! She's a hottie who loves it Greek all right!
Jack Wilson - October 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul Robinson - November 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Spaff - Finally remembered to make it over to your Website (after only a little less than a year, I think). I like it...Scared me with this one, though - I just submitted a parody titled, yup, you guessed it, "Mary Cheney" and was hoping and praying (something I hardly ever do) that it wasn't done to the same OS or with extremely similar lyrics. Whew! OK on both counts. - December 19, 2004 - Report this comment
Belated thanx, Sister Evenstar (I'm sure you would have been anyway) & Sister Kicksass & AFW & Johnglebarry & Michaelopedia & Johnnywocky & Ingebordén & P-Rob & C4P (sorry but evidently not) & Scholar Rhodes & Michaelopedia (again - heh heh) & Adagionary & Peterchyd & Jackie & P-Rob (again - I'll check it out).
Adagio - December 19, 2004 - Report this comment
And here I thought that I had TWO nicknames from the illustrious Spaff. (Have dictionary, will travel lol). Anyway, always noticing your nicknames...they're cute.

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