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Song Parodies -> "Jesus In A Bun"

Original Song Title:

"Seasons In The Sun"

Original Performer:

Terry Jacks

Parody Song Title:

"Jesus In A Bun"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

If anyone drops in here who hasn't read Kristof's "Jesus on a Bun", please do so: it provided the inspiration for this, yet I don't think it's exactly plagiarism. Read both, and let me know what you think.
Hi cardinals! Howdy, Pope Ben
It's time to look at holy money, again
This year we're nearly on the skids:
Compensation paid to kids
[Down] To our last few billion quid

The bills, my friends, have hit the sky
And so the Church has to diversify
A new idea's begun to gel
To save everyone from Hell
Here is something we can sell:

We'll make cash, we'll raise funds selling "Jesus in a Bun"
It's the food that's been blessed
So it's better than the rest

So here's what I propose to do
To increase Vatican revenue
To get more out of Catholics
A precedent without conflicts
Read it in John (chapter six)

We need a miracle indeed:
Five thousand million mouths to feed
But with some help from all our nuns
Only need a couple o' tons
For a billion Jesus Buns

For your communi-un buy a "Jesus in a Bun"
It's the holiest taste
And it's made from reclaimed waste

Too many sales ideas besmirch
The Holy brand of this, our papal church
Focus groups say "don't sell pot"
Or uranium - too hot
Hol[e]y condoms? Maybe not

Won't sell cocaine, or heroin
Someone, somewhere said that it's a sin
No we'll not deal in that stuff
Though financially, it's tough
One masses' opiate is enough

Can't deal drugs, won't run guns, so we sell our Jesus buns
And together sing praise
For the holy cash we raise

We will not be outdone selling "Jesus in a Bun"
But the "Saint John the Bap"
Didn't sell: it tasted crap

We made cash! We had fun selling "Jesus in a Bun"
But the Jude Escargot
For some reason didn't go

In the Star! In the Sun! Ads for "Jesus in a Bun"
You can guess what sold most:
Father, Son on Holy Toast

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.5
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 19

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   7
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   11

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Agrimorfee - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
1's Man, REPENT! 555 Lox Novenas on a bagel for thou, Phil.
Jack Wilson - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Awesome sequel,5s
John Barry - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Yep, gotta cover all those pedophile-priest payoffs somehow.
alvin - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
wonderfully goofy
Kristof Robertson - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Boy, talk about quick turnaround time! I'll gladly take credit for inspiring this one....great spinoff humour here, Philbo. 555
Wendy Christopher - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Do we get Hail Mary's with that? ;^) Wonderful response parody - loved the Saint John the Bap line. You and Kristof should be well proud - 555!
stuart mcarthur - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Fantastic follow-up Phil, and a belter of a last line to match Kristof's last line - 555 - loved "communi-un" too
Phil Alexander - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, guys (and gals)
Kristof - Thanks for the idea.. sometimes when inspiration strikes, it does it with a baseball bat
Wendy - Didn't think to include Hail Marys.. the "Saint John the Bap" line was my favourite, too: had me laughing in the car as I drove
Stu - the "communi-un"/bun rhyme was the first one that kicked the whole thing off, and the last line probably took about as much time as the rest put together, to get the right punchline.
MrMacphisto - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
One of today's best... LOL...
Kristof Robertson - December 05, 2007 - Report this comment
re. your last comment, Phil: exactly the same with mine. It probably took me an hour and a half to write the parody, but about 40 minutes of solid brainstorming (and many rejected ideas) to come up with the last couplet....

To continue the theme, look out for a duet from McKludge and myself early next week...
Paul Robinson - December 05, 2007 - Report this comment
I only remember part of the OS, Phil, but you match to that and this is great stuff, so I'm petitioning the Parody Pope to excommunicate some 5's down to you.
Claude Prez - September 03, 2017 - Report this comment
I remember Kristof's, but didn't even notice this -- awesome! The reason I ran across it is I may or may not be resurrecting the idea I had in K's comment section ten freaking years ago.
H8U - September 04, 2017 - Report this comment
Heretical piece of crap from The Stupid Factory.
Claude Prez - September 04, 2017 - Report this comment
Robert, would you mind just using your real name next time? Thank you in advance for your cooperation.

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