Hello Alexander Bell
I hope you're rotting down in hell
Because my telephone is still beeping
Read my bill and I am still weeping
The decision...that I made with my cell plan
Wasn't grand
'Cause now I'm drowned...in silence

I wake from dreams of ringing phones
Marrow tweets within my bones
Squeak a hello from my sheets lair
I start to holler 'cause there's no one there
Then my eyes just glanced at the flash of a "LOW BAT" light
Well don't THAT bite
'Cause now I'm drowned...in silence

Gaze at that warning light and muse
Three thousand minutes I have used
All that talking while I'm drinking
All those day calls...what was I thinking?
Times I'm put on hold, no choices, just despair
And no one cares
That I'm just holding silence

"Phones", said I, "they really blow"
And hurl mine with a mighty throw
Then the words I detest so much...
"If you need to make a call, hang up"
But my phone, lay shattered where it fell
I wondered...what the HELL???
Then silence

(Slight pause while I drive to the phone store)

And the sales clerk laughed and brayed
At the new choice that I made
'Cause the phone flashed out "YOU'RE ROAMING"
See my mouth, it was now foaming
And the clerk said that "Most of our profits we're gettin' from those roaming calls
The sentiment galls
I whipped him with some rounds...of vi'lence