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Song Parodies -> "Muffin Vittles Helper"

Original Song Title:

"Mother's Little Helper"

Original Performer:

Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Muffin Vittles Helper"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Like puffed bags, they are gettin' up.

Don't be diffident today
Or your muffins will just lay
Like a flat pancake on which one fat sat down.
If you want your treats to fill
Out like tittles full of sil-
icone, then run to the shelf fer some of muffin vittles helper.
In dames, yeast is not so great, but for it your baked goods wait.

Just like a whipped-up soufflé,
Your muffins will make their way
To the stratosphere, puffed like a lung-huffed bag.
Mix it in before you bake; then watch that dough rise and shake.
The oven will make you swelter, but your muffin's won't be svelter.
When you plop 'em on the plate, rest assured they will be ate.

Pop in yeast before the feast;
The oven door's open, implores.
Like blown bags, they'll be gettin' up.

Leavening, when kept away,
Means that your muffins will weigh
Way too much, 'cause they're not able to respire.
No, they cannot airify; they'll turn out adamantine
And be hurled as a foe-pelter; of welts they'd foment a welter.
So please make them fluffy-light, so teeth won't break when they bite.

Pop in yeast before the feast;
The oven door's open, implores.
Like post-bag, they are gettin' up.

This is not hardtack you bake,
Neither is it sugared cake,
So purge suet from batter before you pour
In the pan a healthy dose.
"Pan"'s bread in Español prose,
But "pan" that serves as "pan"'s shelter
Is Germanic, though a speller
Neither way makes a mistake.
Latin led to "pan" we bake.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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alvin - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
great title switch....i like what ya baked up
Tommy Turtle - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Faves: "in dames, yeast" and "foe-pelter". Here're three Fives -- hope you value'em for valium parody.
John Barry - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, Alvin, Tommy.
MrMacphisto - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Much better than a limp biscuit... 5-5-5
TJC - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent verb-mond cuisine, John!
Ann Hammond - August 23, 2007 - Report this comment

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