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Song Parodies -> "76 Years Old"

Original Song Title:

"76 Trombones"

Original Performer:

Robert Preston

Parody Song Title:

"76 Years Old"

Parody Written by:

Sharon Krebs

The Lyrics

I wrote this song for my mother, who will be 76 on her next birthday. This song should not be taken as offense to senior citizens reading this, but it sums up a message from Proverbs in the Bible: "The day of one's death is better than the day of one's birth, as on the day of one's birth, all his troubles lie ahead of him, and on the day of one's death, all his troubles lie behind him."
76 years old and another year
Of collecting a pension and Geritol.
This is followed by stacks and stacks
Of the doctor bills you can't pay-
Insurance won't cover it all.

76 years old, living all alone
With caregivers and housekeepers helping out.
Taking more than your share of pills
That don't help; you remain ill.
Medical care makes you scream and shout!

You can no longer go to the market by yourself;
You depend on a senior citizens' van.
Your arthritis flaring up,
You need Ben-Gay.
Every day you plop down on the can!
You're dependent on a walker, cane, or wheelchair.
Moving so slowly, you miss the nightly news.
When you get to your TV,
You change the channels and you see
Depends™ commercials and get the blues!

76 years old and another day
Of existing with one foot deep in the grave.
Starting off getting up at noon,
You don't know if it's March or June.
Might as well be living in a cave!

76 years old, you don't care at all.
Just a hundred and ten weeks left on this earth.
You regrettably take your place in the mirror and see your face
And think death is much safer than birth!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.6
How Funny: 2.8
Overall Rating: 2.9

Total Votes: 80

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   26
 26
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 2   21
 10
 15
 
 3   10
 18
 13
 
 4   8
 10
 13
 
 5   15
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 17
 

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