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Song Parodies -> "If Jimmy Webb Wrote "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald""

Original Song Title:

"MacArthur Park"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Richard Harris

Parody Song Title:

"If Jimmy Webb Wrote "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald""

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

For Patrick McWilliams. I don't think I need to SPELL out the reason why.
(instrumental opening)

Whitefish Bay is waiting for a ship
if it could get ahead
of the cold November gale.

Between the waves of Lake Superior
twenty-six kay of iron
she had as she set sail.

Fitzgerald's trek was ending in a wreck.
All the iron ore, it sank right down.
Someone steered the ship into the rain.
I don't think the ship could take it.
They were never going to make it.
And they'll never reach the Cleveland port again.
Oh no.

I recall the ship's sick bay and mess
filling up with waves
soon up well past their knees.

The widows and the babies, tears in hands
and the chimes of old church bells
echo through the trees.

Fitzgerald's trek was ending in a wreck.
All the iron ore, it sank right down.
Someone steered the ship into the rain.
I don't think the ship could take it.
They were never going to make it.
And they'll never reach the Cleveland port again.
Oh no.

(instrumental break)

There will be another song for me.
In sun, a... season.
There will be one again, naturally.
It will be pleasin'.
I will write with heart that still is warm
and never let you catch me mock Kirk Douglas' son.
And after all the loves of my life
after all the loves of my life
Catherine's still the one.

I will take keyboard into my hands
and I will... use it.
You will have some patience with my songs
and you will lose it.
I will have the things that I desire
and my passion flows, and running, never checked.
And after all the songs of my life
oh, after all the songs of my life
I'll write more about this ship.

The one that was wrecked.

(long, long instrumental break)

Fitzgerald's trek was ending in a wreck!
All the iron ore, it sank right down!
Someone steered the ship into the rain!
I don't think the ship could take it!
They were never going to make it!
And they'll never reach the Cleveland port again!
Oh no!

Oh no!

No!
No!
No!
No!
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Notice that the O's in that last "No!" number 29, for each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald. I may end up flipping this, and doing "If Gordon Lightfoot Had Written 'MacArthur Park,'" although then I'll have to stretch 2 verses, a bridge and a chorus out to 14 verses. In the words of the late, Great Lakes shipping magnate George Steinbrenner, "The game's not as easy as it looks, fellas!"

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Patrick - August 04, 2011 - Report this comment
It's not easy. I've got an "Edmund Fitzgerald" tucked away too. Might take me til Monday to get it posted. This was a fun one to read. Good luck with your other "pursuits".
AFW - August 04, 2011 - Report this comment
Quite a Smooshy Webb you weave...innovative
Old Man Ribber - August 04, 2011 - Report this comment
Michael - Pure magic. Have you ever heard of the Great Lakes Brewery in Cleveland? Among their brand names are Edmund Fitzgerald, Elliot Ness (he was later police chief of Cleveland), and Burning River remember when that happened?). ;D
Patrick - August 04, 2011 - Report this comment
Wikipedia says the EF's destination was a mill near Detroit. The song says Cleveland. I'll stick with Cleveland because it fits the pacing better.
Leo Keough - August 04, 2011 - Report this comment
Now you'll never have that Wreck to pique again...Great concept and execution!!!
John Barry - August 04, 2011 - Report this comment
Damn clever!

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