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Song Parodies -> "Crown Down"

Original Song Title:

"Downtown"

Original Performer:

Petulia Clark

Parody Song Title:

"Crown Down"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

*Crown Royal: blended Canadian whiskey
When you're alone and life is making you lonely,
You can always pound Crown* down.
It drowns your worries, although your tongue feels furry
After ten or so--Crown down.
You're pissing in the traffic, then you're snoozing, feelin shitty,
Bingeing on the sidewalk, then you're peein' on a kitty,
From too much booze.

Daylight and you need some hair
Of the dog, to forget all your troubles and cares.
So pound Crown down.
It's before 8:00, but pour
Crown down.
Keep up the pace till 4:00.
Crown down--there's some more waiting for you.

Hang on lamp posts so you don't fall down--you are stewed
And you're moving slow--Crown down.
You know by heart the dives that serve booze but no food;
You cry when they close--Crown down.
You can't wait till your arm is bent when closing time is over.
You'll be dancing on all fours and bark and piss like Rover,
Wasted again.

Daylight and you need some hair
Of the dog, so you forget all your troubles and cares.
So pound Crown down
You can't tell day from night.
Crown down.
Your matted hair's a fright
Crown down--you're not feeling alright now.

--Beer break--

And when you find that you're blind drunk
And cannot stand, you'll need to
Find someone who's sober who can
Lend a steady hand to
Guide you along.

You're naked, fleas in your hair,
But you forgot all your troubles,
Forgot all your cares. . .
Pounded Crown down,
Drinking is great,
Pounding Crown down,
You cannot wait for more.
Crown down--
Beverages waiting for you.


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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 2
 2
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Petula Clark - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Loved it! But...my name doesn't have an "i" in it.
alvin rhodes - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
i laughed nonstop throughout..nice job...5s
Johnny D - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
5's ... hey, is Crown Royal good or rotgut? I'm a scotch man, myself. Unless I'm drinking cognac!
Ingeborg S. Nordén - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Great rhymes, pacing and topic choice--plus hilarious imagery. Here's three more fifths, I mean fives, for your trouble...
Stuart McArthur - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
In Australia, Crown is beer - same result, just takes more bottles - funny John - 555
John Barry - January 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Pet, and sorry for the typo. And thanks Alvin, JD, Ingeborg, and Stuart.
Spaff.com - January 29, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm convinced that every parody on this site is autobiographical. Nice job.

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