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Song Parodies -> "Creepy Gonzales"

Original Song Title:

"Speedy Gonzales"

Original Performer:

Pat Boone

Parody Song Title:

"Creepy Gonzales"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

*950 Pennsylvania Avenue, actually, home to the U.S. Dept. of Justice.
I slung bullshit alright in old Texas. I was sort of a clone
Of Robert Bork or Harrold Carswell.
Then I got the call from the dunce,
Also from Texas.

Why don't you go home, Creepy Gonzales,
From Pennsylvania Road*.
It appears that your thinkin'
Ain't goin' with the humane flow.
You're just a gnome who's kind of dopey.
In fact, you're quite off the wall.
Like your patron, you're a no-brainer,
So please stay out of Justice halls.

Creepy Gonzales, why dontcha go home?
Creepy Gonzales, why dontcha leave us all alone?

Hey, lotus-eaters, I'll run Justice in this town,
Like that other, the tort-beater you treated like a leper!

You're just a lapdog—Dubya's puppy.
You know, he used to snort coke.
Your chilling memos mention cellblocks
And say Geneva's a joke.
You hope the committee won't find dirt. . .
Tell Congress what they want to hear
Well if you're like the other messups,
I hope they kick you out of here.

Hey, lotus-eaters. I'll be a lot meaner
Once they green-light me through these hearings.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Michael Pacholek - January 20, 2005 - Report this comment
Let's see: The man who thinks torture is OK is gonna run the Department of Justice... the chick who was National Security Adviser when the worst national security failure in American history happened is gonna be Secretary of State... we've still got an energy-company head as Secretary of the Interior... and the worst chief executive in our nation's history just got sworn in, and at, again. Oh, Canada, terre de nos aieux...

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