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Song Parodies -> "They Cull the Bits Verizon"

Original Song Title:

"They Call the Wind Maria"

Original Performer:

Paint Your Wagon soundtrack

Parody Song Title:

"They Cull the Bits Verizon"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Verizon, Verizon.
They cull the bits Verizon.

So now we hear: the spying game
ain’t on some far horizon:
NSA pests are on their toes
(step on your toes)
as they cull the bits Verizon.

Verizon data does abound—
packets through ether flyin’.
Verizon don’t stand up. . .backs down
and with Brother is complyin’.

Verizon, Verizon,
with cullers it’s complyin’.

Before we knew Verizon’s game
they’d pretend to be whinin’.
But with their data they were free;
Like (Google, Redmond, Yahoo. . . .), they lack in spinin’.

Verizon, Verizon,
they cough up bits, Verizon.

We live in an Orwellian world
full of cyberpiracy
in which we’ve lost, we all have lost
a vestige of privacy.

Despisin’, despisin’—
them all I am despisin’.

Now it’s laid bare: the spying game
ain’t played by the gov. only.
When you’re online or on your phone,
you never will be lonely.

We’re double-crossed because The Man
ain’t just the NSA freaks.
There is equal complicity
on the part of these phone (Google, Redmond, Yahoo. . . .) geeks.

Verizon, VERizon?!*
No truth on the horizon.

Verizon and sidekicks:
loathsome coterie.

*In 2000, Bell Atlantic merged with former independent phone company GTE and adopted the name "Verizon", a portmanteau of veritas (Latin for "truth") and horizon.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.4
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 3.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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AFW - June 17, 2013 - Report this comment
Good to see ya' back with the offbeat tricky verbs and nouns..Where ya' been, on vacation?
John Barry - June 17, 2013 - Report this comment
Thanks, AFW. Needed to take a break; did some traveling. Gotta get to 4K. . .still a ways to go.
Callmelennie - June 17, 2013 - Report this comment
Who's the newbie? Little rough around the edges technique-wise, but we can work on that ;-D. But clearly some talent here. Stick around Sonny, this site needs some new blood
Patrick - June 17, 2013 - Report this comment
Snowden didn't say nothin' to the public, that we didn't, didn't already know.

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