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Song Parodies -> "Calibrated Eating"

Original Song Title:

"California Dreaming"

Original Performer:

Mama and Papas

Parody Song Title:

"Calibrated Eating"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

A cautionary ditty, based on the joke "If Mama Cass hadn't had that last sandwich, maybe she and Karen Carpenter would both be alive today." I switched the order of a couple verses and added another.
After eatin' pounds,
She'd regurgitate.
Her airway was blocked,
Couldn't ventilate.

She's sated before
She'd clean all off the plate.
Cass Elliot heavin',
Till she passed away.

Propped up on her perch—
A lass who hardly weighed.
Unwell, she'd get on her knees,
And in the bowl she sprayed.

Yes, she was skeletal,
And she heaved each day.
Carpenter stopped feedin'
Till she passed away.

You now that each was not real old,
Reaching her final day.
Cass's heart stops beating.
Karen wastes away.

When you're chowing down,
Always moderate.
Whether from a wok
Or barbecue grate.

You can safely store
Enough, but not a spate.
Calibrated eating—
Not too thin or much weight.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.4
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
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User Comments

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Johnny D - November 19, 2004 - Report this comment
'tis a feast indeed.
John Barry - November 19, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, JD.
Leo Jay - April 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Interesting idea. Well done.
Mistress - March 13, 2009 - Report this comment
Great parody.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

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