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Song Parodies -> "Calamine Lotion"

Original Song Title:

"Loco-Motion"

Original Performer:

Little Eva

Parody Song Title:

"Calamine Lotion"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

With apologies to Jerry Lieber and Mike Stoller, authors of "Poison Ivy."
Everybody's scratching a brand-new rash, now.
(Come on, baby, calamine lotion!)
I know you got the cream, you got a great big stash, now.
(Come on, baby, calamine lotion!)
It ain't no baby powder, can't use it on these
the hives that make it look like a weird disease.
So come on, come on, the calamine lotion for me!

You got blisters on lips, now.
Come on, baby.
From front to back
oh, well, that stuff you got to pack!
Whoa, whoa.

Now that you can smear it, lend me the stuff, now.
(Come on, baby, calamine lotion!)
Scratcha scratcha motion, man, it's really tough, now.
(Come on, baby, calamine lotion!)
Rashes ain't easy, now, I lose control.
These things, well, they ain't freckles, no birthmark or mole.
So come on, come on, the calamine lotion for me!

(saxophone break)

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Move and give more of that soothing lotion.
(Come on, baby, calamine lotion!)
Squeeze it on my hands, it's a healing potion.
(Come on, baby, calamine lotion!)
There's never been a rash that the stuff can't subdue.
It's gonna make me happy, no more feeling blue.
So come on, come on, the calamine lotion for me!

You got blisters on lips, now.
Come on, baby.
From front to back.
It's feeling good.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 3.9
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 3
 3
 
 2   0
 1
 1
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   3
 2
 1
 
 5   10
 10
 11
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Welcome to the LIttle Eva fan club, Michael. I did this a few days ago as "Mocha Lotion." Time for "Poison Ivy". . ."you're gonna need an ocean of calamine lotion. . . ."
AFW - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Hmmmm...You sure you ain't meanin' "Gal a Mine" lotion? 5 triple rubs
Serafina - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Hehe...this one was clever. 5 triple rubs from this corner as well.
alvin rhodes - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
a very soothing parody...5s
Tim Hall - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
This song itched for 5s and I scratched it. BTW, Carole King originally wrote this song.
Some person - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Maybe she did, but Little Eva performed it.
Michael Pacholek - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Tim: Eva Boyd was Carole King and Gerry Goffin's babysitter. (The baby turned out to be singer Louise Goffin, recently seen with her mom in a Gap commercial duetting on "So Far Away.") When Carole and Gerry came home, they saw Eva vacuuming, and the way she was moving with the vacuum cleaner inspired them to create the Loco-Motion... "There's never been a dance that's so easy to do." At least until the Lean Back came along.
Ingeborg Nordén - December 25, 2004 - Report this comment
My clicking finger is itching to give you 5's for this!
completely different nobody - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Props to you and Tim Hall for the inside scoop of the original. I didn't know that.

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