Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "My Grandmother's Cat"

Original Song Title:

"My Grandfather's Clock"

Original Performer:

Larry Hooper

Parody Song Title:

"My Grandmother's Cat"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

This version is not to the old-time original, but to the somewhat different Lawrence Welk version with Larry Hooper on lead (bass) vocal, on the flip side of Welk's 1961 Number 1 hit, the instrumental "Calcutta." It's also based on reality.
My grandmother's cat
is too large for the shelf
so he sits knocking things on the floor.
He's bigger by far
than old Garfield himself
and he weighs about twenty pounds more.

The Earth shook on the morn
of the day that he was born
and the veterinarian wowed
and he stopped
never to hear again
when the young cat meowed.

My grandmother tries
crossword puzzles each night
but she never gets to "10 Across"
'cause there on her lap
her cat nuzzles up tight
then he tries to show Grandma who's boss.

'Cause this big feline blimp
wants a serving of shrimp
so his stomach's much more well-endowed.
And she stopped
never to rest again
when the big cat meowed.

He sits by the window
to watch every day
as the birds and the critters go by.
She won't let him out
so he can't hunt and play
and the chipmunks know they will not die.

He has stripped nearly bare
all the lining on his chair
even though Grandma says it's not allowed.
But she stopped
saying, "Oy, vey..." again
when the big cat meowed!
OK, it's not totally based on reality. This linebacker of a cat actually has an incredibly wimpy voice, and he's such a momma's boy, and he doesn't trust anybody else. I don't know what we're gonna do with him if Grandma goes first.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.

Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.1
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   6

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Royce Miller - February 24, 2006 - Report this comment
Wonderful parody.
Red Ant - February 24, 2006 - Report this comment
"but she never gets to "10 Across"/'cause there on her lap/her cat..."; so true. You get to five across here. That shouldn't be puzzling.
alvin rhodes - February 24, 2006 - Report this comment
grandmas and cats...what more can you possibly want?...5s
carol - February 24, 2006 - Report this comment
meow! very good. 5's
Phil Alexander - February 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Brilliant. In my case recently it's been the cat walking across the keyboard when I'm trying to tzxfgubj b
Larry Hensley - February 25, 2006 - Report this comment
555 oz. of cat food.
Michael Pacholek - February 25, 2006 - Report this comment
I showed this to my grandmother. She laughed. (Whew!) Phil: My mother's cat does the sametrheiln will ya get off the keyboard, ya big furry fasdiouy? Honestly. Oh, such a beast! Now I can't see the screen, ya big faskdj;lkasdurfliaksdf,n!
John Jenkins - February 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Say it ain’t so! Mr. Rock and Roll Pacholek introducing AmIright to Lawrence Welk???

Interestingly, the original version of this song, which was one of the two most popular songs in the United States in 1876, was turned into a political song parody twelve years later. The opponents of President Benjamin Harrison created “His Grandfather’s Hat” to suggest that he did not measure up to the standards of his grandfather, President William Henry Harrison.
Michael Pacholek - February 26, 2006 - Report this comment
William Henry Harrison died after a month. Benjamin Harrison should have been so lucky. He seems to have been a decent enough man, but he was poorly suited to the Presidency. And he was so lacking in accomplishment that he was the last of the 43 in my Presidential Parody Project to be commemorated: "Indiana Sent Me." Anyway, the reason I did the Welk/Hooper version of the song is that this is the version I know. My mother still has the 45 of "Calcutta"/"My Grandfather's Clock." In case anyone wonders, Hooper was born in 1916 in Missouri and sang with Welk from 1948 to 1969, then battled heart trouble, then came back from 1974 to 1980 before dying in 1983. Along with the Lennon Sisters (no relation to John), he was probably the most popular singer on the show, due to his booming voice and, later, his courageous comeback.
Michael Pacholek - September 28, 2006 - Report this comment
My grandmother died in May. My mother took her cat in, and he seems okay, except that the three established cats don't like him. But at least he's no longer a nervous wreck around other people.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 3078