Signs that say “kick me” on backs of the nerdy
Hand-held joy buzzers and small plastic turdy
Head with an arrow and bugs in your cokes
These are a few of my favorite jokes

Eggs on your windows and trees full of T.P.
Soap on your sidewalk and drinks full of peepee
Snakes in your undies and loud popping bags
These are a few of my favorite gags

Phone calls that end with my heaviest breathing
Cutting brake lines you go downhill with weaving
Laughing like crazy though I get no thanks
These are a few of my favorite pranks

When the seat’s wet, when the shoe sticks
I am feeling glad
I simply pull out of my old bag of tricks
And boy, I am oh, so bad