Big john!
Big john!

Every morning on the Hill, you can see him arrive.
His kind shoulda been wiped out in 1865.
Kinda broad at the shoulder and narrow in the mind
and everybody knows he's hypocritical kind.
Big john.

(Big john!)
(Big john!)

Big bad john!

(Big john!)

It doesn't really matter where john calls home
when he walks out of the house and leaves his wife all alone.
Around tough questions, he's quiet and shy
until he meets the hookers and just says, "Hi."
Big john.

Somebody said he came from New Orleans
compromising position with a Cajun queen
and a nice massage from a feminine hand
sent a Louisiana fellow to the promised land.
Big john.

(Big john!)
(Big john!)

Big bad john!

(Big john!)

Then came the day when Larry Flynt
knew with GOP guys he could make a mint.
Liars were praying and hearts beat fast.
For the moment, Dave Vitter stands out as the last
big john.

Through the dust and the smoke of his man-made hell
walked a giant of the "marriage-defending" cell.
Grabbed his sagging ratings, gave out with a groan
and hoped his honey of a wife wouldn't leave him alone.
Big john.

(Big john!)
(Big john!)

Big bad john!

(Big john!)

And with all of his strength, he said, "God forgive
me for letting Your teachings through me like a sieve!"
And twenty men scrambled from his career in a grave
and now there's none left willing to save
big john.

Could Bob Livingston come back as a fluke?
Could they even elect old David Duke?
The favorite is ex-Governor David Treen.
But everybody knows it's the end of the scene
for big john.

(Big john!)
(Big john!)

Big bad john!

(Big john!)

Now, he never should've opened that can of worms.
Just look at him now, and see how he squirms.
These few words should be written on his stand:

"At the bottom of this grave lies a dumb, dumb man.
Big john."

(Big john!)
(Big john!)

Big bad john!

(Big john!)

(Big john!)

Big bad john!